Illusive | Tim Bradford

three •

Bradford couldn't help but to admit to himself that he was feeling a mix of emotions. He felt concerned for me, frustrated at the unfairness of my situation because he knew there was more happening. But he also felt a newfound determination to be there for me in anyway he could.

In the morning, I awoke groggy and disoriented. My head was pounding from the effects of the previous nights alcohol. As I slowly become aware of my surroundings, I realised I had gone home with Bradford and he'd let me sleep in his bed whilst he slept on the couch.

Confusion and embarrassment washed over me, and I sat up as I pressed my hand against my throbbing temple.

Bradford entered the room after knocking, his concern evident, as he approached me with a glass of water and some pain relievers. "Morning, Hale. How are you feeling?" He asked with a gentle voice.

I took the water gratefully, wincing at the brightness of the room. "Not great," I admitted, my voice rough. "I'm sorry for... all of this." I apologised.

Bradford shook his head, his concern deepening. "Don't apologise, Hale. We all have our own ways of coping. I'm just worried about you." He admitted.

I narrowed my eyes, looking around. I now noticed the absence of Tim's wife. "Wait, where's your wife? I thought she'd be here?" I asked.

I watched as Bradford hesitated. His eyes clouded with pain. "She's not here, Hale. She hasn't been here for a year." He explained.

Confusion flickered across my face. "What do you mean? Where is she?" I asked.

Bradford sighed, his voice heavy with regret. "She's... she's an addict, Maddy. She's been struggling, and I haven't seen her in a year. I've been trying to help her, but... I don't know where she is right now." He admitted.

My eyes widened, my hangover momentarily forgotten. "I had no idea." I breathed out. "I'm so sorry Tim." I told him, expressing my sympathy.

Bradford managed a weak smile, his eyes tired. "It's not your burden to bare, Hale. I'm just... trying to hold everything together." He admitted.

I felt a strong pang over empathy for him. Despite my own struggles, I recognised the depth of his pain. I reached out to place a hand on his shoulder. "You don't have to face this alone. We'll help each other through our demons, okay?" I proposed.

His eyes flickered with gratitude. In that moment, amidst the hangover and the pain, a new level of understanding and solidarity was formed between the two of us. We were supporting each other through the darkest of times.

I was exhausted after the emotional turmoil after the past few days. I trudged back to my apartment from Bradford's, feeling as though the weight of the world seemed as though it was resting upon my shoulders. I longed for the moment of respite. As I reached my doorstep, my exhausted expression turned to surprise and then to apprehension.

Standing before me, looking somewhat sheepish, was my ex-boyfriend, Alex. His presence spent a shiver down my spine, memories of our tumultuous relationship flooding back.

"Maddy," he spoke, his voice tentative. "Can we talk?"

I hesitated, my guard immediately up. "What do you want, Alex?"

He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. "I heard about what happened to you, and I wanted to check in on you. I was worried."

I narrowed my eyes "You heard? How did you-"

"I saw it on the news," he admitted, avoiding my gaze.

I knew they hadn't published the entire story online, making me feel relieved considering he then didn't know the extent to my damages.

I felt a surge of anger regardless, "you've been keeping tabs on me?" I asked.

Alex winced, realising his mistake. "I was concerned, Hale. I still care about you." He expressed.

I crossed my arms across my chest, placing a stern expression across my features. "Well, you load the right to care a long time ago, Alex. You cant just waltz back into my life after everything that happened between us." I pointed out.

Alex's eyes softened, regret etched on his features. "I know I messed up, Maddy. I was hoping we could talk. Maybe find some closure. I've changed, I promise." He continued.

I shook my head, my resolve unwavering. "I can't do this, Alex. I have my own battles to fight and I don't need you adding to the chaos." I pointed out.

I pushed past him, entering the apartment and closing the door firmly. I couldn't help but feel a mixture of emotions - anger, sadness but also a glimmer of relief. I knew I had made the correct decision, choosing to distance myself from a past that had only brought me pain.

I locked the door behind me, hearing Alex's sigh as he eventually left me alone. I glanced at the time, luckily it was my day off. But I was struggling today to be able to turn the switch off.

I'd always been a cop before I was an everyday person. I'd always been that way.

After a relaxing shower and a nap, I noticed the pile of miss calls I had from my mother and father. Realising I hadn't called them for the few weeks since I'd been back.

I dialled my mums number, but by the way the man breathed into the phone- I soon realised it was in fact my father on the other end. There was a brief moment of silence before he chose to speak, his voice was filled with a mix of relief and concern; "Maddy, is that you?"

"Yes, Dad, it's me." I replied, attempting to steady my voice. "It's okay, I'm doing okay now." I reassured.

There was a deep sigh of relief that echoed through the phone. "Thank God, Maddy. We've been worried sick. Your mother and I couldn't sleep. We couldn't even think straight." He admitted.

I knew everything had taken a toll of them both, as much as they hated to admit it. Tears welled up slightly in my eyes at the sound of how devastating he sounded.

"I'm sorry, Dad. I should've called sooner. It's just been a hectic few weeks." I admitted.

His tone immediately softened, as he understood the gravity of the situation. "You know how dangerous the job can be now, that's not always a bad thing." He told me. But I knew there was a but attached to that sentence.

"But, you know, I was proud when you became a detective. I thought you were following in my footsteps. But leaving your detective job, rejoining the force... I don't understand." He admitted, I could hear his disappointment through the other side of the phone.

I inhaled deeply, allowing myself a few seconds to gather my thoughts. "I really wanted to make a difference, Dad. I can't be a detective anymore. But I can do the hands on work preparing our rookies to be the best cops the can be." I explained.

His voice softened again, full of empathy again. "Remember, Maddy, being vulnerable doesn't mean you're weak. I might not understand or support your choices completely. But just promise me you'll stay safe." He asked of me.

"I promise dad." I promised in return.