Arranged love

frustration and confessions

I wish I knew what his intentions were so I could know what to do. Why can't I flip to the end of the book and see how it turns out before I even open the book, just to make sure I don't get hurt again? Not knowing how it's going to turn out scares the shit out of me because I've been burned before. Who knows what his true intentions are? And I won't know that at the beginning of the book, it's something that is revealed with time. Travis was a perfect gentleman before it all went up in smoke, same with Domenic. They fooled me into falling for them and then I was trapped. Love has brought me nothing but pain, so why would will be any difference?

"You aren't even giving him a chance Juliet" Selena argues, and I sigh, she is right, but she also knows how fucking scared I am of what could become of it if I let myself lean into his embrace. He could hurt me badly, just like the boys I've known before. This is all driving me insane with a range of different thoughts going in a million directions.

"I know Selena. But you know me. I'm terrified" I mumble. She reaches across the table and takes my hand in hers. "Tay. I know you and I know you're scared. But I have a good feeling about Will. Not every guy out there is like Travis and Domenic. There are good guys out there and you don't know if Will is your destiny or not before you give him a chance" she says, and I huff at the mention of destiny.

I don't believe in that until I see it with my own eyes. It's crap because I thought Domenic was my destiny, then I thought Travis was my destiny. Turns out that I'm crap at reading what is right in front of me. Now in hindsight, I can see all the red flags that should have been obvious early on, but no I was blinded by the idea of love. As a child I loved reading books about epic love stories where two people were destined for one another found their one true love and lived happily ever after. Now I know that's just something you read about in books, not something that happens in real life. Love isn't like a storybook where good people get a happy ending. Love is the idea of something epic, it's not realistic.

"You have closed your heart sweetie, but maybe will can open it and dust off the hurt leaving you brand new. Letting people in isn't a bad thing" she adds before I can say anything else.

"Will is... I don't know what Will is... he confuses me and gets on my nerves sometimes, but he is also a good person. He plays with Lilly; he shows me that he cares. But what if it's just an act and he is a wolf in sheep's clothing? I can't be hurt again Selena" I say, and my voice keeps cracking, but I refuse to break down in public. I'm not going to lie and say that I don't have tender feelings for Will, because I do, I'm just scared to act on them.

"I wasn't planning on telling you this but Will came to me a few days ago asking about how to talk to you and that he has strong feelings for you. He seems like a patient man, but everyone has their limits. Try talking to him Juliet, you owe it to yourself to try. I'm not going to force you or tell you that you need to do it, but I think you owe it to yourself. You've gotten your heart broken in the past, but it has also made you stronger. I told him to be patient with you."

Did will come to my best friend to ask her? It gives me involuntary butterflies and I feel my cheeks heat up.

｡ﾟ•┈--୨♡୧--┈• ｡ﾟ

I was hoping that Lilly would be back home when I got there, but no such luck, she is still at the party so I'm alone with Will. "Juliet," he says and comes towards me when I enter the apartment. He has a look of determination and I know that I won't get away with running away from him once more. My heart rate speeds up when he comes closer, but I don't move from my spot.

Gently he holds my upper arm making me flinch, but I don't pull away as he gently caresses my arm down to my hand taking it lightly and leading me to the living room. "We need to talk Juliet," he says, and I panic but I know he is right, we need to talk.