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Was it all a game?

"He's pushing me further away."

"You're terrified to get attached knowing you'll possibly leave, he's terrified of getting attached because of being abandoned...Babe, you need to talk to him." She sympathetically responded, rubbing her palm in circular motions against my back attempting to comfort me. Titling my head, I rested it lightly against her petite shoulder. I knew deep down she was correct, that I would eventually have to resolve this tension and quit avoiding my feeling. I just didn't quite understand how to properly accomplish this.

"How though?"

"Well you walk up to him and start a conversation...it's so difficult, right?"
She sarcastically noted, causing me to reply with an annoyed glare, flicking her forehead.

"I fucking hate you...You're literally no help." I groaned causing her to giggle, wrapping her thin arms around my waist, squeezing tightly.

"Don't worry Scottie, everything will work out...I promise."

God, I hope she's right, because I don't think I can function without him...he completes me. We sat there, engulfed in each others embrace, I knew she was concerned on my emotional stability, but I decided that I shouldn't reassure her that I would be okay. I would Merely be lying...and I couldn't possibly dream of doing that to her, she deserved better.

So I chose not to reassure her because well...I honestly don't know if I'll be okay.
-•-

I stumbled out of bed the following morning dreading the day ahead. Another painfully empty day. Surprisingly my mother noticed how distant and distressed I've become and immediately asked what caused my emotions to adapt to this. I replied with as little information as I possibly could, but the interrogation still continued. This began to irritate me, I felt uncomfortable and exposed. she considers herself an important component in my current life, but in reality that's as far from the truth. How dare she assume she has the right to even remotely question me. Eventually after an intense session of the invasion of my privacy I escaped the tense atmosphere of my cluttered house.

I was terrified, I promised to Kirstie that i'd eventually confront Mitch, but the longer I pondered this the more hesitant I became. I couldn't comprehend the reason he suddenly became so distant, nor was I particularly certain I wanted to be aware of the reason. What if he didn't feel the exact way? How utterly embarrassing and humiliating would that be. It was Painfully slow, but I eventually approached the building I commonly refer to as hell. Glancing at the multiple entrances I took three massive deep inhales attempting to calm my pounding heart.

Deep breaths.

in and out, in and out.

Whoa...shit, That sounds sexual.

Concentrate you dumbass.

This is gonna be a long ass day.

-•-

Finally after multiple hours of torture, it was the last period of the relentlessly long hours I was forced to endure. I was ecstatic, though I had second period with him, he attempted and seceded on avoiding me by completely ignoring that I even Merely existed. So the reason for my intense excitement was because last period was the only moment in these painful hours when he was unfortunately forced to make somewhat of a connection that my mare presence existed. As I timidity made my way toward the auditorium I mentally prepared myself for the amount of pain I might endure being in such close proximity to his frame unable to make physical contact. Steadily Tugging open the massive doors, I began to shift down the isle nervously scouring the endless rows of individuals searching for his features. Where the hell is he? I began to mentally panic, knowing him he'd never skip choir. It meant the absolute entire world to him.

"Everyone take your seats please." A voice echoed throughout the massive auditorium. Groaning in annoyance I obeyed, resting my frame against the closest seat being the one on the imitate left to Kirstie. She immediately noticed my presence causing a slight sympathetic smile to appear, realizing how distressed and emotional I was she grasped my palm giving it a comforting squeeze. Attempting to focus on the actual lesson proves to be far more difficult than I originally expected.
I couldn't seem to focus on anything but him, I was so unbelievably concerned and baffled...where was he? Eventually I couldn't just sit in agony, I couldn't take it any longer causing me to politely request to use the bathroom. Immediately as I reentered the vacant corridor I began sprinting down the hallways searching for a glimpse of him. After what seemed like a decade but in reality was only a mare short amount of time I began to feel discouraged. Heading back toward the auditorium, my eyes suddenly caught a glimpse of two figures shoved into the far left corner of the corridor. Attempting to stay sculled i remained behind the nearest wall glancing at the display that directly stood in my line of sight. I was utterly shocked. I couldn't comprehend what my eyes were glancing upon. His figure was pressed up against another boy, lips gingerly attacking his own.

The brunette hadn't noticed my presence so this continued on for what appeared to be a century. My heart was shattering, crumbling under the sight of this. I was undeniably jealous, this boy got the pleasure to touch him the way I craved and desired most. Tears began to slip down my cheeks as I continued to gaze at this heartbreaking pubic display. I desperately Attempted to keep my presence hidden, but eventually utterly failing miserably. a vocal sob escaped my mouth, causing both figures to immediately separate and discontinue their actions.

As His eyes met mine everything immediately came to a screeching halt, my heart shattered causing my erupt in light breathy sobs. resulting in his pupils showering over, as tears began to Cascade down his skin.

"Scott..." He spoke inching his figure closer, causing me to instantly shift backward avoiding physical contact at all costs. He lifted a single hand attempting to place his palm Against my blotchy cheek, but he noticed my tense posture causing him to immediately not continue.

"Scott please I can explain." He begged, I couldn't mentally or emotionally handle this, I felt like my entire world came crashing downward. I could practically sense the cracks that suddenly appeared in my heart. I don't understand. I kept shaking my head as I continue to strolled further backward avoiding his touch. My mind was swarming with negative thoughts, and eventually I couldn't stand there feeling betrayed. Twisting my figure I sprinted in the opposite direction to escape this, this series of unfortunate, painful recent events.

Was this all just a twisted disturbed game?

I reached the exit, lifting my palms to cover my ears attempting to tune out the heavy sobs of him crying my name. Leaning against the door handle I shoved it forward, entering the pavement lot.

I couldn't stand to be in his presence it was agonizing...my heart couldn't bare it. So I Did exactly what he was terrified of, Abandoning the beautiful brunette boy who broke my heart...and immediately regretting it afterward.

A/N: Ohhhhh what will happen...you'll just have to wait and see, so mysterious ;) - Laura