One Hundred Sleepless Nights

7

I try not to spend my entire shift thinking of if Tony is going to come in or not. I'm in the back doing prep work - Liam is out front so if Tony comes in he'll have to just wait - like he's making me do. 

I wont lie though, him playing hard to get is really working on me, making me want to get him even more. The chase of getting someone is the most exciting part of the whole thing, so I already know its going to be great when he gives in, which he will. We already made progress last night, although I don't remember the entire night last night which is worrisome, I don't know if I told him things that I shouldn't have. 

If I'm trying to retrace my steps I can remember us leaving the bar around 4am, completely out of it. I told Tony I lived down the street and asked if he wanted to come over which surprisingly he said yes. He didn't feel like sleeping yet and wanted to keep talking, so we walked to my place and hung out in my living room, still drinking but at that point we had started adding water alongside so we wouldn't feel as bad the next morning.

I know I talked about my family, about how they kind of live close by. I told him about the fact that I dropped out of university when I was in my last year, I told him what I wanted to do in life before I started bartending. I think I even told him about the scar I have on my index finger on my left hand - a knife accident from when I tried to cut into something frozen. Other than that, my mind is blank.

I think we passed out in my bed around 6, but I guess only Tony knows that. I'm not sure why he agreed to sleep in the same bed as me - a complete and utter stranger that he's only seen twice. He said he doesn't hookup with strangers but I guess sleeping beside them is perfectly fine for him.

"Alia?" Liam says coming into the back where my prep work is getting done slowly thanks to my zoning out.

"Yeah?" I say, peaking around the corner at him.

"Someone's here for you." he says.

I wipe my hands on the sides of my pants, excited and nervous. Tony's here.

"If you want to head off go ahead, its dead in here tonight. I don't mind closing up." Liam says to me smiling genuinely.

I've always found Liam cute, but cute in a younger sibling or cousin way. He's 22 which isn't that much younger than me but it really feels it. He's still excited for the future, he's going to school and has a girlfriend he worships and a friend group that goes out partying at night and plays soccer the next morning. His parents pay his apartment because they have the money and because they did the same for his brothers when they went to school. I learned all this by the second shift I worked with him. He's talkative and eager to share, which again, makes him cute in a younger family member way.

"You sure you'll be okay?" I ask him. I don't want him to run into any issues after I leave.

"Easy peasy." he says then ducks back out front.

I do a quick check of my hair in the mirror above the sink and then I'm following behind where Liam just was.

Tony is sitting in the booth near the front door. He's wearing vans as always, black jeans and a light grey hoodie. From here because of the dim lighting its almost like he doesn't have any tattoos at all. He doesn't notice me taking him in due to the fact that he's on his phone, clearly texting someone.

I use his distractedness to my advantage and try to sneak into the booth in front of him without him seeing me.

I make it about halfway to him before his eyes lift and land on me immediately as if he knew I was there. I don't think about it for long because when he sees me a smile lights up his face and it makes mine do the same.

"I got worried you weren't working tonight." he says to me as I slide in the seat in front of him.

"I'm always working." I say and its true. I'm here more often than I'm not.

"So if ever you blow me off I can come here and wait for you to show up?"

I roll my eyes at him. "I wouldn't blow you off."

"Oh?" he says, clearly gearing up for some smartass remark. "Because last night you said if I slept with you that you'd leave me alone after."

"If you slept with me I promise I wouldn't leave you alone afterwards." I say, putting my arms on the table and using them to pull myself forward so I'm closer to him.

"I doubt that." he says, leaning back in his seat. 

Whether he knows it or not, he subconsciously just put space between us which means I'm not as in as I thought I was. I need to up my game.

"So if you weren't interested then why did you come home with me last night? Why'd you sleep in my bed with me?"

There's a flicker of something on his face. It flashes across so quickly that I barely have time to recognize it, but I do. Embarrassment. 

"Maybe I missed sleeping beside someone." he says, staring at his phone beside him. It lights up with another text, another distraction.

"You can always sleep in my bed." I say to him.

He gives a dry laugh. "Five minutes into this conversation and you're trying to get me into your bed. Is that all you want?"

I give a slight shrug. "I like talking to you too."

"Then lets just do that. No beds, just talking. Outside. In public. Maybe while eating." 

"Are you asking me on a date, Tony?" I ask, not inherently against the idea. 

"I am."

I pretend like I'm considering it, bringing my hand up to my chin and rubbing it which causes Tony to roll his eyes at me.

"What did you have in mind?" I ask after several seconds of pondering the idea.

"Have you ever been to Dobson's?" he says referring to one of the nicer restaurants around.

"You want to go to Dobson's?" I ask.

Its not that I'm not into it, its just a fairly fancy place to go and its a bit intimidating. Its definitely not what I would consider first "date" material, but then again I haven't been on a date in forever and I don't have the same pay that Tony does.

"Nah, just wanted to see if you wanted to. I actually know this little place near one of the theatres, Balboa, I think. Has great food, its not too crowded either. I'm busy until like 2, though."

"AM?" I ask, confusion plastered on my face.

"No I obviously meant PM, Jesus. I figure you were working tomorrow night so we could go for a late lunch."

"Oh, thats actually really considerate." 

"Yes because usually I'm not."

"Okay calm your little attitude down." I say trying to be serious but a smile fights its way to the surface.

"So?" Tony asks, looking at me attentively.

"So?" 

"Do you want to go for lunch with me tomorrow?"

My brains answer is to immediately say no and then quit my job so he doesn't know where to find me again, but thats unrealistic. I don't do dating, I don't do friendship. I don't want to. Didn't want to. But this is nice and it feels almost natural and I can't keep letting something that happened in the past influence how I live my life. I can't block myself off to every single opportunity I get because of one bad one in the past. Its not fair to other people and its especially not fair to myself either.

"Yeah." I say. "Lets go."