Life is but a Dream {ChenJi} | ongoing

eight

Ten minutes later, Chenle's in a neighbourhood he vaguely recognises from a party back in primary school, of a friend he doesn't hang around with anymore. But every neighbourhood looks the same. Townhouses in rows, trees – either cherry or birch – at every equal interval along the pavements, cars parked neatly on driveways beside the overgrown front gardens that every homeowner pretends not to notice. The sun has gone in, covered by a layer of clouds that darkens by the minute. Chenle grits his jaw to fend off the chill. It's nearly May for crying out loud, he shouldn't be cold.

He keeps walking, paint smeared across his blazer like a pin screaming look at me!. A woman walking her dog does a double take. He hopes she doesn't recognise the uniform and call the school to report his obvious truancy. Because if the school doesn't care about his outburst, they'll definitely care about his absence. Assuming the receptionist hasn't already grassed him up, that is. She's always been a bitch.

He turns the corner and sees the park in the distance which helps him regain his bearings. He can breathe easier too, knowing familiarity is near. The park is a large field of overgrown, dewy grass surrounded by trees with an old playground on the far right. A mother is already there with two toddlers that beg her to push them higher on the swings. Chenle used to come here as a kid, often with Johnny while Taeyong took Mark to the hospital. Donghyuck would dig holes in the mud. Renjun would read on the bench. This was before Jeno and Jaemin arrived.

Chenle reckons everyone in this town and their parents and their grandparents grew up in the playground. He pushes the gate open, cringing as it squeaks horribly. Paint peels off the roundabout and the swings creak and the slide is scratched as though a cat has gone down it. The toddlers get bored of the swings and take turns on the slide instead, their mother giving Chenle a tired smile before she follows them, three bags slung over one shoulder.

Chenle sits on a swing. He dumps his bag on the ground. He digs the toes of his shoes into the dirt, already hearing Taeyong's huffing in his head, and uses the anchor to rock himself back and forth, not fast enough for the chains to groan but enough to soothe his anxiety. The metal is cold under his hands. He grips the chains tighter until his knuckles whiten. It's not comfortable but neither is the churning of his stomach. Throat dry, he replays the moment the paint hit his clothes. He replays all the awful things the same boy has said to him over the years. When tears threaten to spill he clamps his eyes shut and swallows, counts before opening his eyes again.

There's a crow that wasn't there before pecking the grass a few metres in front of him. Chenle stops swinging and holds his breath. The bird's feathers glisten and shine like a mystery, tempting enough to steal his curiosity yet dark and familiar enough to freeze Chenle in place. They're black, with a hint of brown and grey on the ends of each wing. A pattern he's seen before. He blinks and, even as the tears subside to clear his vision, the feathers glimmer brighter. The bird pecks some more, flaps its wings, then turns its head to stare at Chenle. Its beady eyes meet his, and Chenle can't look away. Black, ringed with a searing white that pulls Chenle in deeper. He swears he can see himself in those eyes. That glisten, the flickering of a light. He leans closer, and the bird doesn't fly away.

Food? It seems to say.

Chenle's eyes travel to his school bag. He has lunch and snacks he certainly isn't going to eat. He contemplates feeding his sandwich to the bird. As he thinks that, the bird hops closer on its little black legs. Its beak is just as dark as its eyes, and shines like a threat.

Food! Chenle hears it this time. It squawks, long and ugly. Chenle recoils.

It hops closer, unbothered by the screaming kids across the grass, and this time Chenle's tears make its little round body shimmer like an ethereal being, with both the brightness of a god and the unforgiveable shadow of a demon. Chenle closes his eyes. He starts to swing again, and the toddler's voices and the bird's screeches and the swing's creaks merge into a horrible ringing in his ears that he can't shake away. His heart hammers in his chest. His lungs burn, throat dry even as he swallows.

He's flying now, swinging higher and higher. Back and forth, the swing creaking each time like the same thoughts replaying in his mind day in day out.

"Chenle!"

Chenle drags his feet across the dirt to stop himself. He nearly lurches off the swing but grips the chains and looks up, heart pounding so hard he can't hear what Johnny's saying.

Johnny crosses the playground, picks Chenle's bag up and slings it over his shoulder. His thin coat is unzipped to reveal a faded coffee stain on the beige jumper underneath. He's tall, but as he crouches down to Chenle's height he shrinks into a shell of worry that thins him to the bone. Chenle bites his lip and looks down.

"What happened, Lele?"

Chenle sniffs while Johnny inspects the paint on his blazer. The red doesn't shine anymore, now dry.

"I'm sorry. It wasn't my fault. You know I never get paint on my clothes," Chenle says.

Johnny shakes his head. "I know it wasn't your fault. Renjun told me you'd left school." He extends a hand. "I was about to do the groceries, anyway. Why don't you join me and we can chat about it. Sound okay?"

Chenle looks at Johnny's hand. The hand that's guided him through his childhood, through the pit of his preteen years, and now offers to help him through his teens and out the other side. He doesn't have a choice so he takes it and stands on wobbly legs, and follows Johnny out the gate and across the park to the car.

The crow is gone, he notices when he looks back for a short second. The grass shines in its place.

✧˖° 🍦 🫧 ❀

Johnny to the rescue!!! Where can I buy one?? LOL please comment and vote if you enjoyed <33