As I've grown the little girl inside me has been there, I can feel her in my chest ,dragging my heart down with all of her fear, pain and loneliness.
Fear of being rejected, fear of not being loved, fear of saying something wrong because it might hurt someone's feelings and I don't want to do that because I know how it feels to hear something that lingers with you for days, weeks, years.
I wish I was more honest.
No, I don't like your top, yes, you did annoy me yesterday, no, I don't want to go out of my way for you...again.
But I can't. I smile and say that looks lovely or don't worry you didn't, or of course, no problem.
Is this a power or weakness? To feel everyone else's emotions before they even feel it for themselves. Trying to protect them from getting a pit in their stomach and in turn carry the weight on your own, because you're independent and strong and it's just who you are.
I don't want to be strong.
I want to be free, free of the burden of opinion, free of pleasing other people and forgetting to please myself.
I just want to be free from this magnet sticking me to the floor, in the same spot I was born.
I just want to move forward.
I want to dance under a spotlight, sing in the highest key and laugh until I sound like a pig.
Is that life for me? Or is this just where I'm meant to be?
أنت تقرأ
What A Time To Be Alive
الشعرCollection of words. Each feeling, each emotion and each problem shared through a questionable stream of consciousness.
