*Quinn’s POV*
I remember how it feels to cut yourself. It’s like bleeding the posion emotions from your system until theres nothing left. I’ve done it before. When we were young, me and Tyson. He did the eqivilent to breaking up with me. The first thing I did was run to the razor.
Now it’s calling me back. These last few days are some of the worst of my life. The boy I love is with a girl and it hurts more then someone who’s never known love could understand. But I refuse to let him walk all over me. He can’t have both.
Those are my thoughts. That’s not how I respond when he walks into our room.
“Quinn….” he says, startled to find me in here. I’m normally out with Tia.
Hearing him say my name seems to break some sort of emotional dam inside me. The tears start falling for what feels like the millionth time and I twist to bury my face in my pillow, sniffing madly and wrapping my arms around myself. It feels like my arms are the only thing holding me together.
I feel Tysons hand in my hair, running his fingers through it. I get up a little and cuddle into his chest, sobbing desperately there, in the area that was always mine but I now know I’m sharing. He held me there, rocking us gently. “You’re killing me here Quinn” he sighs.
This is annoying but I ignore him and climb up his body. I nose my way into the in of his neck and then just nuzzle him over and over again, looking desperately for some form of affection. He groans a little in pleasure well my tears run down his skin.
“Why are you doing this to me” I pout when I get my voice back. It’s raspy.
“I’m not doing anything to you” he replies “You’re the one who’s changing everything”
“You slept with her!” I wail. Then I’m blubbering “Is this because I wasn’t ready for sex Tyson? Because I’m sorry but I was so scared, so scared. I didn’t want everything to change between us, and I knew it would hurt, and I was scared, but if I had of known this would have happened I would have done it, I would have slept with you in a seconds because I..” I stop. I can’t tell him I love him. It hurts to much.
*Flash back* (kinda dirty. Don’t read. Unless you want to. I wouldn’t. its not very good. RUN. God im embaraassed... :/)
I groan in pure pleasure as Tyson kisses his way down my stomach, not ever hesitating or uncertain. He knew I was his, just like he was mine. Besides, we’d gone this far before. We were both shirtless and hot with eagerness. Maybe this time we’d finally go all the way.
The thought turns me off a little. We had lube hidden away in our closet, but I’d Google’d it before and every source had said it hurts insanely to be in the position I’d be in. Tyson noticed my body tensing rested his chin on my stomach, holding off on the kissing. “Something wrong?”
I shake my head “N-no” he kisses my navel in response.
“What’s wrong love?” he asks. I blush.
“Just-not all the way please” I beg with sparkling eye’s. He smiles at me disappointedly.
“Okay, not tonight” he agrees. That doesn’t stop him from tugging my pants off suddenly.
“TYSON!” This is something we’ve never done before.
“Shh. You said not all the way. I’m not going all the way. But I am curious…”
Heat floods my face, but I bite my tongue to keep from saying anything.
His hand disappears inside my boxers and I gasp as I feel an unfamiliar sensation in my core as excitement reaches my member. “Tyson..” I groan, my voice shuddery as his exploring hands probe the most private part of myself. His fingers trace the length before he wraps a hand around it. I throw my head back and groan. I’ve never done anything like this before. He starts rubbing.
