Little RainDrops |LGBTQ Story(: | by Jasmine Davis (A PREVIEW OF EACH CHARACTER)

Annabelle {1}

"Just be brutally honest with yourself Annie, your hips are too wide and your stomach is too thick and you look like a drug addict. I mean look at your face, it looks like a truck hit you and left the paint smeared all over you. In order to be accepted as a women, you need to act like a women. Caution your food intake, exercise, and stop dressing like a rag doll. Maybe even then, you won't be a women. I don't know what to do with you Annie...Sometimes..you seem so.....hopeless..."

Hot, continuous flows of tears rolled down my cheeks as my mother left her harsh words in my head as always...According to her, I needed to follow this set of rules in order to be a women, but I think she honestly just hates me....I mean my brother got none of this verbal abuse...but then again my father took care of him. You see my parents believed in a literal half and half system. My dad raised my brother and my mother raised me, not allowing the other to step in to parent the other child. I understood none of this because they weren't divorced and they always shared information about my brother and I to each other, but they forbid any discussion about changing the way one was raising the other. Happy couple....miserable kids..

Ever since I can remember, my every flaw stood out to my mother, and she felt the urge to always point them out and tell me how depressed my imperfections make her. She always said the cruelest things, blaming me for not fitting into societies ideal perfect women. Of course, I wanted to fit in, I'd always wanted to be seen as something to my mother. Make her proud of me.....so I'd done everything possible to make that happen. She wanted me to be like her, skinny and beautiful and worried about the appearance.

"Annie, if you have a beautiful outer core, what's inside won't matter, you'll be craved by everyone, envied by women, and desired by men. Trust me."

The only words that ever came out of my father's mouth were, "Annie..just do as your mother says, she knows best."

The same night my mother came into my room and started lecturing me yet again. All I was doing was reading a popular favorite book of mine and she ripped it away from me, throwing it against the door.

"God gracious sakes, don't you ever listen to what I say? Another hour reading is one you waste from doing something to improve your body, physically. Get up and do something productive. I'm going to my yoga class and your father is taking your brother to dinner." My mother walked away, looking back at me like I was a disappointment to the world.

That was the first time I'd ever cut...

I remember the warm, dark blood running down my skin, down my inner thigh, mixing with the messy tears falling from my face. 7 puffy, red lines still dripping with pain remained.

I couldn't sleep that night, not that anyone came home until the early rays of the morning. Writing was my escape...and that same night, I'd started what would be known as my Tips To Be A Women Blog. Every night, I would update every thing my mother would say to me and use it as a tip. Then, I'd track my calories for the day, my exercises, and how many times I'd cut....It became an addiction...one thing that would let my pain escape from my body.

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Anonymous Addict:

Day 1

Weight: 157 lbs

Number of Cutting Scars: 7

Exercises: None

Calorie Intake: 2500

Tip #1: "In order to be a women, you must eat less, exercise more, and apply more self dedication." ~A's Mom~

Starting today...I will be on the journey to be a perfect daughter, and an even perfect women. I deserve nothing until I am the perfect women.

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It was all I'd ever wanted...to be seen as something to my mother...and I would be..