Greykin Valley

| 29 | Doctor's Orders

Tokala frowned at him. "What?"

"I couldn't keep everyone together. Aysel's out there somewhere with Romulus because I chose Jackson over her—over my own brother's mate. And now Alastor is dead because I chose to cross that river. If Alaric were here, everyone would still be together—"

"I'm sorry, chief, but...there's no way you can know that. And I'll say this again because it's true: no one blames you for any of that. You had every right to choose Jackson; he's your mate, and Aysel destroyed your bond when she decided to start sneaking around with Elias. Everyone understands," Tokala said sympathetically. "And I mean...chief, we're out here seeking something that might cure the cadejo virus, something none of us would have ever thought possible. We all knew the risks, but we all came with you anyway. You're our Alpha, we trust you, and wherever you go and whatever you choose, we're with you."

Damon sighed again and stared at the burrow ceiling. "Ever since Aysel left with half of the pack, I've just been feeling a lot unlike myself."

Tokala nodded as he rested his arm on his knee. "Of course you'd feel like that. Everything changed, like...immensely, chief. You lost Aysel and your sons, you lost half the pack, and you found your mate. And then we were all evicted from the place we thought we'd call home. But you handled it all very well. And even now, what you're doing is for the better of all of us—hell, not just us, but all wolf walkers. The world, even. Alaric wasn't wrong when he made you our leader."

Did everyone really think that highly of him despite everything that happened to prove otherwise? Did no one think that they might have been better off with Aysel? Wasn't there a single wolf that regretted leaving the safety of the Venaticus building?

"We've all got your back, chief," Tokala assured him. "And you know...I am here if you ever need to talk. I mean, it's sort of my job, right?" he asked with a smirk.

Damon laughed quietly and dragged his hand over his head. "Thank you, Tokala."

The orange-haired man nodded and got up. Then, he walked off and joined Remus, who was sitting with Brando, Bly, and Lance.

But the moment he was alone, Damon could feel himself slipping back into that dark pit of self-doubt and depression, and questioning himself when he needed to be thinking clearly would get more people killed. He wasn't going to give up because Tokala was right; the pack trusted him, and he couldn't let them down. They were out here to find a way to stop the cadejo virus, and that was what he was going to do. Alastor didn't die in vain, either, and Damon would make sure that everyone knew that.

He took a deep breath and banished as much of his uncertainty as he could. They still had a long way to go, and Alastor needed to be buried. His pack deserved to mourn him properly.

"Everyone," he said as he stood up.

They turned their heads and stared at him.

"Alastor deserves a proper burial, and I'm going to make it my personal mission to ensure that he and everyone else we have lost will not be forgotten. What we're out here doing is for the benefit of every wolf walker, and we'll fight on to ensure that no one else has to suffer the same fate as our packmate," the Alpha called sternly. "Alastor was a brave, resilient fighter, and without him, not one of us would be who we are today. But above that, he was a friend—he was family—and we will all carry his memory with us."

Everyone responded with their words of agreement.

Damon looked at Sebastien, who was no longer in his hound form. "Will you carry Alastor outside so that we can bury him, please?"

Sebastien nodded and shifted, but when he tried to get Alastor's body on his back with the help of Tokala and Brando, Wesley snarled defensively at them.