I'm Not the Only One

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Shad grins at me and opens the passenger side door. On the way home, I hold his hand and watch the town pass by. I know Shad doesn't like Link very much, but I also know he would never wish anything upon him, even after last Saturday. Shad isn't like that. I just wish I could erase that one moment at the lake and make everyone forget about it. I don't know why I was acting that way towards Link. At least now I understand why Shad was skeptical of Link at first, and I understand his anger. I would be angry, too.

When I get home, Shad walks me to the door. He insists it's only because he wants to see Hope.

Dad is home and greets us from where he sits on the couch, preoccupied with something by his feet. He picks up little Hope and rubs her tiny head with one of his big fingers.

"Isn't she cute?" I ask him. Hope meows in content as I rub beneath her chin.

"You're mother will kill me when she finds out how much I love this little girl," Dad laughs. He gently passes her to me.

I hold her in my arms, but she's moving around too much. Hope ends up climbing my shirt with her tiny claws and standing on my back. It doesn't hurt, only makes us all laugh. She looks at Shad and meows.

"Well, you're curious," Shad says. He takes her off my back and holds her in his cupped hands. She plays with the ends of his thin leather bracelet that's always tucked under his sleeve. I smile upon seeing it.

I gave him that bracelet a long time ago for his birthday. I had bought it from the county fair. He and Ashei were looking at the crafts with me. Well, they were more like following me. But there was one stall they both actually looked at. Ashei's was a stand with hand-made knifes and scabbards- no surprise there. She bought one that looked like it belonged in the Renaissance time. Shad, on the other hand, had made a comment about liking the details on a bracelet at a simple jewelry stand. I asked why out if curiosity, and he said it reminded him of his Sky City research. When he wasn't looking, I bought it. Just the memory of that day makes my heart swell.

"She's adorable," Shad says. He sets Hope down and we watch her tumble over our shoes. "Like you."

"Shad!" I groan, blushing at the same time. Dad chuckles at my embarrassment and Shad smiles.

"I better get going," Shad says.

"Yes, please." I push him out the door as if I can make his comment leave with him. I can hear him chuckle as he walks to his truck.

"Maybe you should give him a chance," Dad chimes as I walk past him.

I groan and cover my face with my hands. "Dad." Hope follows closely behind as I hurry up the stairs. I close the door to my room and huff. Boys.

I sit at my desk and try to start homework, but Hope plays with my shoelace and distracts me. I smile and scratch her soft head when something else catches my eye. One of my notebooks lies abandoned under my desk. Picking it up, I leaf through the pages, grinning at each doodle. Ashei and Shad are the focal point of most of them. Sometimes Mom and Dad appear, maybe me. Towards the back, there's that picture of Link I drew what feels like forever ago. His shy smile makes me blush.

Turning the page, there's another doodle of Link. He's in our marching uniform and Talon rides his back like a horse. I giggle just remembering it. On the next page is the day at the lake where Link is guiding my hand to pet Time. Below this one depicts Shad sitting alone in a camping chair, Time at his feet. He grins sadly at him.

Suddenly, I recognize that grin. I turn back the page and look at the first picture of Link, flipping back and forth. I can't help but think it's the same smile. Confused, I flip through the rest of the notebook. There are a few doodles of Ashei. A little more of Shad. But the pictures that show Link gradually morph. His hair shortens and darkens a shade. His face thins and lengthens a touch. He begins to look like someone else. . . he almost looks like Shad.

No. That's a mistake. The similarities don't mean anything.

Right?

When I get to the end of the notebook, I find two loose pages. These were the pictures I drew in Chemistry.

One is of Link. He has his earbuds in and is smiling gently as he looks down at his work. I wish Link could stay like this - happy. I wish I could draw him a good life and put him there, where there was no desire to run from anything.

The second picture is of Shad. I drew this one because I had drawn Link. I wanted Shad to be happy, and he is in the picture. But from what he's told me in the last few days, I wonder if he really is.

Maybe he's not happy when he goes home. Maybe he waits for the time to pass before he can leave. Maybe he has to work harder for his happiness. Maybe I'm the one that makes him happy. And to think, I've also been the one causing him pain.

That's it. I have to forget about Link for a while. I must pray for him, but when I'm with Shad and Ashei, it'll be Shad and Ashei I think about. Nothing else.

I close the notebook and grab my phone. Before I leave for work, I text my friends, asking if they want to see a movie Saturday. From now on, I'm done moping. Link is my friend, but I can't do much to help him now. I'll give my focus to Ashei and Shad. Especially Shad - I owe it to him.

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