Cry of an Innocent Wife (On Going)

Chapter 23

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#unedited hindi ako marunong gumamit sa bagong enupdate ni wattpad.. nakakalito.. getting to know stage pa kami hahaha 

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Eden's POV

"Oh Eden, bakit gising ka pa?"

Napalingon ako kay manang na halatang kakagising lang it's 5am and I bet maghahanda na siya para mamalengke.

"Hindi po kakagising ko lang po and I can't go back to sleep", I lied. I really can't fall asleep simula pa kagabi

"Ahh ganun ba, nagugutom ka ba? Anong gusto mong kainin ija?"

"Ayy, hindi na po, hindi pa po ako gutom, magpapahangin lang po ako dito saglit", pampawala nang init nang ulo, gusto ko sanang sabihin but I don't want to involve manang with my problems

"Ganun ba, sige papanhik muna ako ija, mamamalingke pa ako", she said

"Sige po manang mag-ingat po kayo" napabuntong hininga nalang ako nang naka alis na si manang.

Honestly I just want to be away from our room. Everytime i'll stay there, everytime I isolate myself the more sumasakit ang ulo ko sa kakaisip. Gusto ko mang matulog dahil sa pagod pero heto hindi ako makatulog. His last words keep on replaying in my mind. To the point na naririnig ko na ang boses niya, para na ata akong mababaliw.

My mind just flew and think about what happened awhile ago.

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"Honey I miss you so much", Jake said and hug me tight  he then kiss my lips but just 2 smooch lang naman.

Perhaps he's waiting sa sasabihin ko and what to respond on what he said. But I just can't utter any word. I don't want to say sweet bullsh*t things na alam ko naman hindi yon ang gusto kong sabihin.

And most of all ayaw ko naman siyang bulyawan na galit ako aa kanya, for being so lier, stupid husband na walang ibang alam kundi saktan ako, ako na asawa niya. If I will tell him what I truly feel baka I ended up saying about my plans na lumayo sa bahay na ito. I know how powerful Jake is and I know he will have the ability to stop me lalo nat gusto kong dalhin ang anak namin.

I just smile and give him a peck on the cheek kumawala ako sa braso niya and went to the bathroom. I just wash my face and try to keep myself on thinking straight ayaw kong mahulog nanaman sa patibung niya. Because I still love him I'll be hypocrite if I say no. But this love is not good for me and for this family. This family that I tried my best to build again.

We just both prepared to sleep nang hawakan niya ang braso ko. I was stun at thesame time scared at baka saktan na naman niya ako. I slowly lift my head to see his face and I let out a huge sigh. Hindi galit ang itsura niya. He actually look like tired and sad. I don't exactly know why, but maybe dahil lang sa napilitan siya na umuwi dito.

"Kung gusto mong bumalik sa kung saan ka nanggaling you can go, I won't mind", my mind said that but my heart wants to say the other way around. 

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Baka kasi napilitan ka lang umuwi", hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili ko na sabihin ang hinala ko and that I think is the reason kung bakit di mapinta ang mukha niya. Nakita lang naman siya ni Alden eeh. Kung hindi siya nakita malamang hindi pa siya uuwi ngayon.

"No, I really want to go home. Besides I just want to surprise you and Jaden", LIE!! I want to shout that word on his face, napaka laking sinungaling nang lalaking to.

"Ganun ba, welcome home", I said at humiga na sa kama. With my back facing him. I heard him sigh at humiga na rin, he just hug me and spoon me. It actually feel so good but at thesame time I am thinking it's so wrong. I need to put my guards up.

Pinakiramdaman ko lang siya hanggang sa makatulog siya. I can still hear his little snores halatang pagod na pagod. I move to face him, kaya halos magkalapat na ang mga mukha namin. I just want to stare at him all night. Kasi baka this will be the last night na magkakasama kami. We'll never know what will happen tomorrow.

I trace his thick brows with a perfect shape, na hindi ko malaman how could a guy have a perfectly shape brows na hindi naman nila kailangan unlike girls na mahilig sa pag shape nang kilay. Dumako rin ang mata ko sa mahaba niyang pilikmata, where I slowly brush my finger to it.

I can't help myself to smile tracing his sharp nose and going down to his red lips. And let out a big sigh. How could be a dream suddenly becomes a nightmare? I've been doing this to him years ago. Not until that incident happen hindi ko na nagagawa ang maliliit na bagay gaya nito. My eyes starting to mist hanggang sa pumatak ang isang butil nang luha na kanina ko pa pinipigilan.

ring... ring.....ring.....

Biglang nag ring ang phone niya that made him woke up. Kaya dali-dali kong pinikit ang mata ko. He kissed me on the lips and then sat in the bed to get his phone. As far as I know its 3 in the morning already, so sino naman ang tatawag sa ganitong oras?

"Hello"

I can't hear well ang boses sa isang linya but just a fade... cry?? I'm not sure.

"Hey... hey.. sshhhh stop crying.. Ok I'll be there baby.."

Baby.. I don't know what to say. I expected it but... it's still so painful to hear, my eyes are starting to mist again.

"Ok i'll be there........ alright Savannah enough. I'm on my way"

So it's Savannah as expected, I try myself na pigilan ang hikbi ko. Nasasaktan pa rin ako. How bulls*** love will be. 

When he put down his phone. He then lie down and hold my face with his both hands. I just wonder if he could see my tears but even if he can't see me, I know he could feel it. Ang mga luha na bumabasa sa mukha ko.

"You still cry until you fall asleep", He said and let out a big sigh

" I love you so much Eden. And I mean it when I said I'll change for you. I'll do everything for you", he then kiss me on my lips.

I just hope he will not notice my lips trembling. Pagkatapos niya akong halikan tumayo na siya at nagbihis hanggang sa narinig ko nalang ang pagsarado nang pinto.

Sunod-sunod ang hikbi ko. Hanggang sa ang tanging iyak ko ang umalingawngaw sa apat na sulok nang kwartong ito. Hindi ito ka gaya nang dati na umiiyak ako dahil sinasaktan niya ako, umiiyak ako ngayon dahil gulong-gulo na ang utak ko, ginugulo niya ang isipan ko. I feel so empty, I feel so lost. I'm totally lost. I don't know what he meant by all that.

"Bakit Jake.... Bakit ka ganyan"

Hindi ko na alam ano ang iisipin ko. Litong-lito na ang utak ko sa mga nangyayari sa paligid ko.

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AN: Ayan pati ako rin nalilito sa nangyayari haha, sorry kung mayroon mang mga mali-mali na names nang character. I will edit po, sa tagal kong nag UD nakalimutan ko na ang names haha, SOrry wan melyon tayms!!! alam ko oo kasalanan ko na, Ang tagal kong nag UD alam ko galit na kayo sa akin pero hangover pa kasi ako sa nangyayari sa buhay ko ngayon, Para sa mga readers ko who wishes me luckfor the Board exam, THANK YOU!!! NAKAPASA PO AKO!! YEHEEEETT RN na!!  kaya lutang pa ako ngayon haha, dahil hanap-hanap nang trabaho nang may mai-ambag naman ako sa lipunan hahaha. wala na akong excuse para hindi mag UD kaya gumagawa na ako nang maraming drafts. salamat sa pag intindi ME LABS YOU ALL!! :* <3 <3

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