𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐬𝐚𝐦 𝐟𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐬𝐢𝐱𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧

𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚

I woke up the next morning wrapped up in Sam's arms around my body. He was holding onto me tight as if he was scared to let go. My head and heart had a million feelings going through them. Fear, happiness, anger, safety. 

I sat for a while staring at the room around while letting my thoughts roam free for a minute trying to come to some sanity. My sixteen year old self was cursing my twenty eight year old self while also being happy at current circumstances. 

Sam started to stir next to me as he woke up, bringing me back to reality. 

"Morning Rose" He rasped out in his morning voice which almost killed all doubts in me. 

"Good morning" I smiled back as he pressed a kiss to my head. 

"I'm scared if I wake up fully this will either be a dream or the conversation we will have will end not how I want to" He spoke, making me tense under his touch.

"I think reality was lost last night for both of us" I laughed a little, my nerves playing through. 

"It could be reality this, but it isn't that easy is it?" He asked, stroking my hair.

"I've only been home for two weeks and here we are. It feels like a chaotic romance, I mean we are chaotic but I don't think we can just sleep together and forget everything that happened and get back together" I sigh. 

"Okay" He says, stopping to think before speaking again. "How about this? We don't forget everything but we don't go back to hating each other either and arguing all the time or being strangers. We try the friend thing?" He says, sitting up and looking me in the eye. 

A feeling settled inside me in that moment. A feeling of I don't whether this will end good or bad but I don't want to loose him again and put myself through that heartache. 

"We'll try the friend thing" I smile as we sit across from each other for a moment in silence. 

"Right I better be going, mam will be skitzing said I was only going for a few" He said causing us to laugh as he gathered his things from the night before.

That conversation was easier than I ever wished yet it left me with a feeling I couldn't even describe. I didn't even want to delve into it as I fell back on my bed and let out the loudest sigh ever.

My mind fell back to one of the first interactions we had back when we were fourteen before there was any romance between us. 

I sat in a Science lesson writing away, answering the questions on the board as my friend who was sat between me and the blonde boy was talking away in my ear. Suddenly the teacher spoke to stop writing and get ready for the bell. 

"Shut up small person" I spoke to Brandon as he made some stupid comment. 

"Oi say that when stood next to Sam" Brandon spoke as he pointed to the tall blonde boy next to him. 

For some weird reason we both stepped closer to each other, comparing heights as Brandon laughed. 

I looked into his eyes with my arms crossed and I felt some weird feeling that I did not let my brain register.