real people - j.k.

nineteen

"What's wrong, Josh?" I asked as he walked by.

"Nothings wrong." He said. Something was obviously wrong, he looked like he had a million thoughts going through his head. "I need to, uh, talk to you."

"Okay..." I trailed, not really sure where this was going.

"I know, I'm acting weird, just bare with me." He said, making me even more confused. We made it to the couch, taking a seat beside each other. He was running his finger over his lip, looking down at the floor.

"As you know, we're about to leave. And, lately, I've just been..." He trailed off once he looked at me, loosing his thoughts. "I need to, uh, I..."

I was growing anxious at the way he wasn't saying anything. I felt like this was rather important, and he was taking too long.

"Oh, fuck it." He groaned, standing up off the couch, startling me a bit. "Lynna, I really fucking like you. I - I haven't been able to get you out of my mind since the other night. I've liked you for way too long. It's driving me crazy knowing I haven't told you yet."

I felt too stunned to even breath. I mean, I kind of knew, but I wasn't expecting it. I looked at him, wordlessly, trying to straighten out my thoughts.

"And — and, I know, it's really lame of me to say this just to leave in a few hours, but I simply couldn't wait. When I kissed you, it took everything in me to not tell you. You're everything I want in a person, Lynna, and I need you to know that." He started again after I didn't say anything. I meant to say something, I was just struggling to find words.

"I...I, uh, really like you too." I said, his face immediately turned. He looked relieved, like he thought I wouldn't like him back. "I like you a lot, actually, probably an unhealthy amount."

"So, you are 'crazy' about me?" He asked, toying with the words from last night.

"Don't ruin it, Josh." I smiled, not wanting to debate that in the moment. "But, yes."

He grew a smile, a mixture of satisfaction and a bit of cockiness. He sat back down beside me, looking to me. Slowly, he reached his hand over, moving a strand of hair from my face. His hand stayed on my cheek, softly caressing it. I prepared myself, feeling the same anxiousness I did the other night. I was tired of waiting, moving towards him. It felt somewhat like last time, but a bit hungrier. It felt so right, I couldn't explain the way it made me feel.

I could've kissed him for eternity, the way it made everything melt around me. His lips were so soft, intoxicating, leaving me needing more.

He pulled away, leaving me a bit confused. He seemed just as hooked as me, still lingering close.

"What's wrong?" I asked, almost a whisper.

"Come with me, Lynna." He said softly. "I don't want to go without you."

"Josh..." I trailed, not knowing how to respond. It seemed so much harder now to say 'no.'

"You said you needed something big, why can't this be enough?" He begged, rubbing his thumb over my cheek.

"Don't get me wrong, this is, uh, pretty important. But, I need some more warning." I said.

"Why not? You've said you wanted to live on the road, you can do it." He asked, his eyes boring into mine. There was a desperate look in his eyes, making me feel guilty all throughout.

"I have a job, I have a cat, my apparemment, Frankie." I listed, wishing I didn't have to deny him this. "I want to go with you. I would love to go with you, but I need to be able to support myself."