This is How We Break | Jungkook

Part 2

[flashback]

~~

You groan at the faint knock on your door, curious as to its unsure sound but irked at its timing. It had been another sleepless night. Waking up at 5AM, you decided to just do the chores that you're in charge of this weekend, since your roommates Jimin and Areum are off to another out-of-town date and Yoongi is in his hometown to watch a concert.

You finished half an hour ago and had fallen asleep with the TV on - a usual Sunday occurrence whether you clean or not. Work is tiring enough as it is and your once energetic and wandering self has slowly lost its inspiration to do your weekend market explorations and ice cream runs by the river.

Your mind has stepped on the brake of making plans, of trying out new things, of joining your friends on weeknights or even weekends for some karaoke or drinks at a rooftop bar.

The 7-day week is just not enough, even more so a 2-day weekend. Saturdays are usually spent with Jungkook, and Sunday is the only time you have for yourself, which you usually spend sleeping or chowing down your favorite ice cream or watching your house flipping shows.

It's why you're confused when you see your boyfriend standing by your door, with an expression on his face that you can't quite read. You used to be good at that, figuring him out, but it seems that you haven't been good at it for a while.

"Kook? What are you doing here?"

Jungkook knows you don't mean it in a bad way, but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt any less. He remembers a time when you'd excitedly ask him when the next time you'd see him would be. He realizes now that you haven't done that in a long while. There used to be elation when he'd tell you that he could spare some time aside from your usual Saturday house dates. He realizes, too, that he hasn't heard that squeal nor seen the eye-reaching smile you used to greet him with for some time.

Perhaps it's another sign he was hoping he wouldn't get.

You were supposed to see each other yesterday but you had a work event and he didn't mind, as he had a paper to work on, too.

"Alright, I'll see you next week," you'd said. Not even Sunday, which would've been today.

He thought about that a lot; too much, in fact, that he didn't finish his paper. He didn't actually get much done for the rest of the week, failing his graded recitation and barely passing a pop quiz.

There was a time when you'd make time out to visit him in his dorm near the university if he was too busy to see you on a weekend. It didn't matter if it was too far from your place, or if you were too tired. You'd go regardless because you wanted to see him.

He realized yesterday that he doesn't remember the last time you'd visited him there.

You hadn't seen each other in three weeks - work and law school have done that to both of you. That last time you were together was just like any - he came over to your place, like he had whenever you agreed to meet up. He brought lunch, you had sex, then tried to watch a movie you both passively decided on, had sex again, slept, then you ordered dinner. The same thing that happened the week before that. Then the week before that. And before that.

It wasn't the stagnancy that bothered him; it was your passiveness. Your dates used to consist of cafe hopping and shopping and hitting the gym - a little something for each of your interests - but somewhere along the way, you'd both resigned to staying at your place. Sex and food. They'd become the only things you now shared.

But it was still time with you, and he always enjoyed it wherever you spent it, no matter how little, and regardless of what you did. But he can't really say the same for you.