Deprived

Chapter 51 - Touch

He slowly crawled over, shivering over his entire body as he pushed Xavier's shirt aside. And slowly, ever so gently, Jesse nestled against Xavier's chest.

Tucking his arms between them and sighing as Xavier understood and gently pulled Jesse into a hug. Not restricting him, simply resting his arms against the young man's lower back.

"I'm so proud of you, darling."

The praise made Jesse flush awkwardly, as honestly, what was praiseworthy about him? He barely managed to lay down upon Xavier's exposed chest, listening to his steady heartbeat as it lulled his own into obedience.

If anything, he should've been able to handle more. Some of the other Deprived already stood further in their recovery, were able to mingle and well... do more.

Hell, a few were starting to build their own relationships once more.

Yet Jesse still felt awkward, ever so fearful. Trapped and contained by his own memories, the trauma that seemed to chuckle, sneer and latch its claws further into his mental wellbeing.

Xavier smiled, gently caressing Jesse's back as he whispered, "Remember that you are also the only one who was drugged by Draco's concoction. The others might seemingly be progressing quicker than you, but that doesn't invalidate your own progress."

"I know." Jesse whispered, shivering and relaxing a fraction as his body slowly realized Xavier wasn't doing anything besides the gentle petting. "I know that but..."

His fingers clenched around the bedding as Jesse closed his eyes. Even if he understood what Xavier was saying, that didn't keep the whispers and self-doubt at bay. The reassurance made him even feel worse at times, simply because he only felt more like a hassle.

An adult man that always needs reassurance, who can't do shit without flinching and ducking for cover. Spooked by the smallest noises in the night for no reason-

"You do have a reason to be terrified." Xavier scolded, moving slightly so he could look down as Jesse glanced up at him. "Just because you need time to recover from this complex trauma, doesn't make you weak. Crying after the torment you've been through isn't weakness or emasculating. Honestly, I would've been more worried if you had sat there, stone cold and without a fraction of emotion after what you've been through."

Jesse's heart stuttered, a tearful smile lighting up his face before he nodded. Xavier returned his smile, pressing a gentle kiss against his forehead.

Xavier shuffled his weight slightly before Jesse felt him pause. The man gently patted his back as he murmured, "Though, I do need you to move sweetheart."

The odd question made Jesse blink as he pushed up, confused to what Xavier meant. He could see a hint of panic in the man's eyes, hands grabbing Jesse as if to move him off of him.

And as Jesse sat back, he realized what Xavier meant as his ass squarely planted itself on the slight bulge in his pants. A bulge Jesse felt grow generously against him while Xavier covered his eyes with his arm, uttering a whispered apology.

The young Deprived flushed beet red, swallowing audibly with his hands still planted on Xavier's exposed chest.

And even through the box of trauma that wanted to burst at the seams, Jesse realized Xavier's response, or rather lack thereof.

Even though his arousal and desire was more than obvious, Xavier wasn't clawing at Jesse's skin to get what he wanted. In fact, a smile crawled on Jesse's lips, noticing that Xavier was blushing harder than he was!

Xavier's throat bobbed as he swallowed before whispering "I'm sorry. I'm trying to-" He jolted, silenced by a single finger that pressed against his lips.