↱FIRST↲ ⇾hongsan⇽

together

They had spent nearly the entire year on their tour, flying across the world with only a few weeks of rest in between, and now they were in Japan to continue the last half of the tour that was supposed to wrap up in a few months.

They were all on edge, struck with nerves, suddenly feeling as though every song they've ever sung and every choreography they've ever practiced was unfamiliar, no longer part of their routine due to the small break they'd had, and the night before a concert day never came with the best mindset.

There was a lot to remember again, a lot of steps to a perfect performance, and that alone was stressful.

Then you pair that with a Japanese audience, and a newly out Hongjoong and San, and it makes for an all around shitty night.

"I think, uh," San started hesitantly, buttoning up his jeans.

"I think I'm gonna go live for a little while." He sat down on the bed beside Hongjoong, not trying to hide, but not exactly making eye contact either.

Hongjoong looked at him for a long while before finally deciding to grab his hand.

"Do you want me to stay?"

"It's my song, Hongjoong," San conceded, even when for just a moment it looked like he had considered the option.

"I think it should be my responsibility to discuss it with the fans."

Hongjoong knew he was right.

Of course he was.

They had been silent for long enough, posting selfies on Twitter as though nothing had happened, pretending not to notice that every comment was about their announcement.

It wasn't something they had addressed yet, and Hongjoong knew there was never going to be a right time.

There was never a right time when there was still a hint of fear, and Hongjoong wasn't sure if that feeling would ever really go away.

Hongjoong nodded, bringing both of his hands over to encompass San's.

"Okay, I'll go somewhere else then. Leave you alone to talk to them."

"Thank you." San sighed, the relief in his features limitless, but that didn't make Hongjoong forget the worry that had been instilled on the younger's face when he came out of the bathroom.

That didn't mean everything was okay.

Hongjoong moved to place a hand on the base of San's neck, thumb dipping into the shadow of his collarbone, nails running soothingly down the back of his hair, and it was a tactic that made San smile beautifully in the daylight, bare skin and fresh eyes warm where they turned to face Hongjoong.

"Everything's going to be fine," Hongjoong told him. "You'll see. They aren't mad at you, just confused. You can't really say they saw this coming, you know?" San nodded, humming softly in agreeance as he placed a hand on Hongjoong's thigh.

"They still love you, San."

The younger finally seemed to fumble at that, a weakness breaking in around the eyes at Hongjoong's words.