The divination commission has hired a new jade abacus engineer to maintain their Matrix of Prescience, a new maintainer. As a reward for doing a great first job, Fu Xuan decides to give him a divination, but the divination goes awry as the vision it...
My eyes are heavy. I tried to nap on my desk, but there was little room for anything but the documents that just kept piling up.
The clock had struck midnight- high time for bed. My feet dragged me to the pile of clothes I had in the corner. I switched out into nothing but my pajama-shirt.
Despite the cold, the shirt stuck to the sweat on my skin. My office had become extremely messy as I'd been living out of it over the past few days. I had little space for sleep...
Alright! Time to begin my self-rehabilitation plan! I will clean up my office and put my clothes in the wash. Tomorrow for sure, I will go outside!
Having decided that, I put my long, unkempt hair into a bun and armed myself with a broom, a dustbin and a garbage bag.
As I began getting into the rhythm of tidying things up, I got into a pretty happy mood. Nothing, not even thinking about the maintainer, can ruin this mood!
...
.Why do I do this to myself?
I glanced around the clutter. A wave of exhaustion fell over me. The cleaning did nothing to soothe the cold. My chest felt so tight it was hard to heave a breath. I was walking towards my desk to slouch back into my chair when-
Knock knock.
Startled, my head flinched towards the door.
Who could it be at this time? It's well past midnight.
Without bothering to change out of my pajamas, without even bothering to wear pants, without even the energy to care, I pulled that door open; the cold didn't stop me in time.
***
(Maintainer POV)
Her figure appeared from behind the door.
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She was clad in nothing but a single shirt, which barely covered past her hips. Sweat clung to her cheek, which was flush in shock. Her mouth was agape, a strand of hair a centimeter away from her lips, sticking to her skin. The rest of her hair was messy, tied up in a bun which hung tightly behind her little head. Her face had no make up, her thinner lashes letting me see more of her eyes.
She's so cute! Why did I ever refuse to see her as anything other than the "master diviner?" Because I wanted her to be perfect?
What a fool I was! Fu was perfect as long as she was Fu, whether she was the master diviner or not!
Her eyes were frozen in fear. Stunned, understandably so. She turned around and rushed to close the door, but I braced it with my left arm and grabbed onto her shoulder more roughly than I'd intended-
"Hyah~!"
A muffled squeal escaped her mouth.
An awkwardness filled the air between us, a conversational stalemate.
Now that I think about it, we know nothing about each other. I had held her on a pedestal since our first meeting, and she'd weirdly avoided me since the divination she gave me.
We had nothing to talk about. We just stared at each other.
One moment passed, then another. Under that doorframe, our eyes were locked. I could feel the heat radiating off of her body through the hand I had on her shoulder.
***
(Fu Xuan POV)
Ahh! How could this have happened!? My heart isn't ready to confront him!
My mind raced, panicked. My eyes darted around everywhere, avoiding his face. I turned around, rushing to close the door, but he kept it open with his arms and held onto my shoulders so roughly I squeaked!
I wanted to at least change into some presentable clothes, wash my face and put on some makeup, but as I am right now, I don't even have my panties on! One small, slight breeze and I'll have no choice but to make maintainer take responsibility and marry me!
He's so close, I can smell him! A slightly sweet tea scent came from his body, stuck to his clothes...
Wait, I haven't showered in 2 days!
I struggle, trying to break free, but he shifted the left arm that was on the door and grabbed onto my hand and pulled me closer.
Stop~! I stink!! -as if I could ever say that!
"Fu! Please calm down, I want to talk to you!"
...I stop struggling and try my best to breath slowly and calm down, but my heart doesn't stop beating like a speeding starskiff, and I'm still out of breath. I look up at his face, his stern, serious expression staring down at me; it was telling me to listen.
"Fu I-... "
He glanced away from my eyes for a moment, organizing his words in his head. I eased up from the door and held his hand.
"Fu... I know I hurt you and lost your trust, but I want to start over again, from square one. I- I want to learn to understand you, to talk with you and hear your stories... I know you might not want to, and that you might not want to forgive me but, could you give me a chance? "
Maintainer... I-
...I hurt you as well. My bad habit of hiding my feelings behind my words, expecting you to understand me despite us never getting to know each other. I know you never meant to put me at a distance, you just didn't know how to deal with how pushy I was being.
...Yet despite that, you took the first step for my sake, even though it was my own immaturity that caused this. I... I finally figured out what I love about you~... ///
It's only fair that I take the actual first steps now instead of trying to rush to the finish line like I did. No more trying to reach a future through blind foresight, no more hiding my feelings, no more fumbling around you.
This time, I will do things in the right order. I will get to know you, understand you, feel your feelings... and when the time is right, I will confess. I can only hope that by then, you will love me back...
I pulled him in by his arm and stuffed my face into his chest. It was so warm in his embrace under that doorframe. The real him was so much warmer than the "him" from the divination.
...Maintainer, you never lost my trust, and you never will. Let's start over, from zero.
I pried myself away from his arms and looked him straight in the eyes. My face was flush and teary, but I tried my best to put on a smile.
