My Little Shadow

Chapter Twelve: Broad, Teeth showing, Show-stopping Smile

The door slowly opens and I'm expecting to see Mr. Jaded but it's his wife wearing curlers and in nothing but her nightgown.

"Oh, my goodness, isn't it good to see you, Andy!" She calls out over her shoulder to her husband who I can see is asleep in the recliner in the Livingroom.

He jumps nearly a foot in the air stumbling as he stands up. "Woman! Your bout' gave me a heart attack."

He limps to the front door where his protest turns into something more along the lines of stunning joy.

"Ahh, Thatcher. I've been waiting on you to stop by son." He pulls me into a hug through the door frame. "Why don't you come in and eat dinner with us?"

"I have company in the car. I was coming by to see if I still had a job." Mrs. Jaded scoffs and a bombarding laugh comes from her mouth.

"Son, that old man of mine has refused every young boy that's come to his door looking for work, holding out for you." A weight was lifted off of my shoulders knowing that I still had a way to pay my bills and take care of my newfound responsibility.

"Thank you, I would have come yesterday but the family wanted to see me." I thought about my father's outburst and suddenly wish I would have and come see Mr. Jaded last night instead of attending that dinner and then I'm reminded that my mother had missed me, and it made her happy to see me.

"You're alright I'm just glad to see you around here again. You got some catchin' up to do around here." He had a cheeky grin on his face, and I couldn't help but grin myself.

"I'll see you Monday then?" He nods his head quickly.

"Let me not hold you and your lady friend up." I didn't have time to ponder on how he knew it was a woman in the car waiting on me because Mrs. Jaded pulled me to the side and gave me a sad smile.

"I hope I didn't overstep dear, but I put out some flowers at sweet Angelina's graveside. Pink, because I remember that was her favorite color. This old brain of mine forgets a lot of things but I could never forget that sweet girl's pink Crocs every day she came with you to work."

I smiled at the woman, thanked her, and made a swift exit. As soon as their door was closed, and they were out of earshot I let a shaky breath escape my lips.

I was mad at myself, relieved for Angelina's grave, hurting because I wasn't the one to put the first flowers there.

A hundred and one different emotions were bombarding my thoughts and body that, the shakes were uncontrollable.

Just breathe, August.

Why was something that comes so naturally to others so hard for me at this moment? Why did a basic human need have to be so hard?

I wish the air was so thin that it pushed into my lungs without a wheeze, wished that when it sat deep in my chest it didn't feel this heavy.

May knew something was wrong the whole trip back to my house. She glanced at me frequently, she was worried it was easy to tell but I was okay, I would be okay as long as she was here.

"A long, long time ago I use to believe that if I just kept pushing in life eventually I would get to where I wanted to go." I began speaking out of nowhere, we were only a few minutes from my house. "All of my brothers have their own thing. Sawyer's a coach. Killan a CEO. Shoot even Archer is a chef in training. Here I am still working the job I had when I was seventeen. I used to not mind that fact when my daughter was here because my life didn't matter as much anymore. Here I am still pushing when the whole world seems to be pushing me back. Yet, I've made it nowhere in life."

This would be the point in my speech where someone would interrupt me and tell me to just give it time or see it through, but May didn't. Whether it was because she couldn't or because she chose not to, I would never know, but at this moment, she was the best listener I've ever met.

She simply sat her hand on my shoulder and squeezed it firmly enough to let me know she was still there.

Still listening...

~.~.~.~.~

That night Archer didn't come, he says he had some research to do for school, so sleep wasn't even a question for tonight.

I was very aware that May was right down the hall asleep on my couch yet again. The house was warmer with her here and I let my brain wander off to an imaginary situation where I would introduce May to Angelina and tell her about how she was important to me. That wouldn't stop my stubborn daughter from grabbing May's pale hand and pulling her off to her room where she would pester the silent woman with questions about her favorite stuffed animal.

My chest aches and I have no idea why I put myself through this, I don't know why I can't block everything out, why can't I just forget her for a moment? It would be easier and hurt a hell of a lot less.

"No! Please ..." A woman's voice echoed down my hall and the covers were instantly pushed onto the floor from the shock. Was someone beating on my door for help? I lived in a decent neighborhood, the likely hood of that was slim but not impossible.

I rush into the house and the voice grows louder and louder. "Stop!" This time it was followed by an on slaughter of screams and cry's that chilled me to my bone.

It wasn't until I was almost at the front door that I realized that those cries weren't from some random stranger. They were from my shadow still asleep on the couch.

My heart pounds and pounds roughly in my chest. She was dreaming, she was back with those men that hurt her all that time ago.

I ran to her, my socks sliding on the slick freshly mopped floor. She was squirming around the couch, her bare legs kicking a demon away.

I crouch down beside her and hesitate for a moment before I put both of my hands on the side of her face and run my thumbs over her high cheekbones gently.

The pads of my thumb grew wet from her tears but the kicking stopped and the screaming stops. The only thing left is the whimpering of my broken woman.

Slowly her eyes opened, and they were the bluest I had ever seen them. Her rusty, hoarse voice comes stuttering out of her mouth like a streaming waterfall, "August?"

~.~.~.~.~

Thank you @_jnxl_ for the idea, I love it, and thank you for reading the story<3

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