Monsta [book 6]

0015

I blink.

Me: I'm sorry what?
Lila: Their old manager Leroy..-

Oh Lord she knows Leroy!

Lila: Posted an ad in the paper. I use to work at a club and thought the work was similar but then I found out just how exclusive it was.

I look up remaining eye contact, she's searching for some kind of reaction from me. On the outside I'm cool as a cucumber, very professional. On the inside I just killed all seven members.

Not because they had a... pleaser before me but because they failed to mention it.

And the nerve of her getting me to be her therapist of all people. I'm going to tell Cina we need to tighten up these background checks again.

Me: So how did you feel being in that line of work?
Lila: Numb, I had to do what I had to do.

I get that.

Lila: I didn't get along with any of the members though. It was like a mental thing, we weren't clicking. When I had sex with Hyungwon he wasn't into it. Same with Jooheon.

Mmm mm mm.

Me: How long were you with them?
Lila: The contract was for a year. I could count on both hands how many times we actually had sex though. Any other time it was just me cleaning and giving blowjobs. Except Kihyun, he never let me touch him.

My baby.

Lila: But something happened..

She plays with her fingers.

Lila: Towards the ending I had sex with Wonho and a few months later I found out I was pregnant.

My head snaps up to look at her and she's in tears.

Me: Lila...
Lila: I couldn't get back in contact with them because Leroy said it was be legal trouble if I did! He said he would ruin my life if I tried to tell the media. I couldn't say anything.

My mouth goes dry.

Lila: I didn't keep the baby but that's been heavy on my heart for a long time.
Me: I can only imagine.
Lila: So when I read about you in the papers I couldn't help but wonder how did she come to have a polygamist marriage with them? Unless she too was hired.

I sit back letting out a breath I didn't realize I was holding.

Lila: I've never told anyone about that and I'm sorry if this seems like I'm blindsiding you but you're the only one who could relate.
Me: So with that situation what is it you feel like you're not healing from? The abortion? Unspoken feelings?
Lila: All of it. I feel like it was unfair that I gave up my child all because of some stupid contract.
Me: And you weren't ready to raise him alone?
Lila: Absolutely not. I would've ruined his life with my struggles but if Wonho knew then maybe he would've had a chance.

She sniffles and grabs a tissue.

Me: If Wonho knew I have no doubt he would've been very supportive. They all would have.
Lila: All of these years I've been searching for closure.
Me: The thing about closure is it can either help or make things worse.
Lila: I just want to tell him.
Me: Tell who?
Lila: Tell Wonho.

peter rabbit would be wise to stay out of mr. mcgregor's garden.

Me: Because you feel like he deserves to know?
Lila: Yes. Don't you?
Me: From a professional stand point I see why you want to.
Lila: And from his wife's stand point?
Me: She has no stand point in this office. I told you, profession is separate from personal.

But as soon as I go in that house!

____

I walk into the house and the all look at me.

Minhyuk: We beat you home.
Shownu: You had a lot of clients today, huh?

I smile sitting down my work bag.

Me: Yeah I had a new one today.
Changkyun: How'd that go?
Me: Good.
Jooheon: Are you sure you're okay?

I slide off my earrings.

Me: Peachy, something interesting happened today.
Kihyun: What?
Me: I met a girl who knows all seven of you.

Everyone's face holds confusion.

Me: She knows all of you personally.
Minhyuk: Like a fan?
Me: Nah, more like..

I hum.

Me: A pleaser.
Shownu: A pleaser?
Hyungwon: Oh God.

He realizes but the rest of his members don't.

Hyungwon: Santana we..-

I wave my finger.

Me: I'm not mad.
Changkyun: Why would you be? We don't even know who you're talking about?
Me: Oh you don't know Lila?

Silence, complete silence.

____

happy monday! a new episode of cruel summer came out today so that's what im gonna do!

also happy juneteenth ✊🏾