Confession to my partner

UPDATE MENTAL HEALTH - TELLING A DOCTOR STUFF

Here are my issues/reasons I believe I have an undiagnosed 'condition' or label -

Short attention span Trouble listening/taking in lots of info in a short sentence. If someone gives a lot of info in a short sentence, I literally do not understand what they just said. Doing lots of things at same time rather than one at a time, not finishing things sometime - restless sometimes. For example - Tonight I was practicing the violin, I play for 30 seconds, watch a violin tutorial for 10 seconds, get up and drink my coffee which is in the kitchen, check on my partner in the other room, come back and do all these things again in various orders. Random sleeping habits, cannot sleep at night, tired during day. If I go to bed at night, even if tired, cannot sleep for hours and toss and turn. Bad memory. Even if something happened 30 seconds ago and I wasn't paying attention I do not remember it. For example, one evening I came home from work and was ranting about a bad day, then I complained to my partner that he was ignoring me, he told me he literally got up and hugged me, but I ignored him and continued to rant, so he sat back down, and then I got annoyed because I thought he was ignoring me even though he hugged me like less than a minute ago. Trouble understanding simple things. Gets stressed easily. Gets anxious easily . Paranoid (nervous of people walking behind me/getting too close, being suspicious of everyone - this may be because of being stung by people so much in the past) Takes long time to settle down and do stuff Obsessive, emotional. Constantly checking on my partner to the point its annoying. Dreams often, sometimes bad, has had nightmares, 2 occasions where I literally woke up streaming/shouting and one occasion I woke up speaking angrily due to bad dream. The entire sentence I was trying to speak was - 'how would you like to know how it feels?' - was dreaming about my abusive father whom I hate, and Geoffery from Game of Thrones. Trouble getting jobs done. 'Fix curtains' has been on my 'to do list' for literally months. I know I have anxiety and depression and PTSD, which might explain some of this, but I always knew (even as a kid) that there was something 'wrong' with me. I was just different, and as a kid I didn't know how to socialise properly. This is not a problem now as I am open and friendly and comfortable around strangers (not scared of approaching strangers and asking them things/telling them stupid jokes or complementing their hair/clothes) I am asking this question now as I have recently learned that someone blood-related to me (close relation) has been told they likely have ADHD. My mother was very emotional and sometimes had outburst of anger (nothing malicious - likely anxiety) she ended up unaliving herself due to depression. This was back in the late 90's/early 2000, when mental health wasn't as well understood. There is definitely something wrong with my uncle (still living), on mother's side. He is a mature adult but doesn't understand simple concepts, like why I cannot visit him, despite him living overseas. Like his mental thought process doesn't take in rational things like, I have 2 jobs, pets, no money, no passport. He just gets annoyed and defensive. Not to mention he doesn't understand why I don't want to meet him anyway as he has had literally zero part in my life and I honestly didn't even know he existed until recently (last few years) I am a mature adult btw. So anyway, long rant. I know I have something else wrong with me besides the anxiety, depression and PTSD. Please help. I plan to call doctors tomorrow. Hopefully I will actually get this done, as I often plan to do a lot in my head, and often end up doing none of those things. Also my mind is all over the place and when I talk, I often jump to different subjects and forget my original point. EDIT/ADDITIONAL I JUST THOUGHT OF - also am a slow thinker, nexaed a long time to make a decision, even a simple one.

ADDITIONAL ADDITIONAL - easily frustrated, even at simple things, frustrated to the point of tears, like pqperwork, which easily confuses and annoys me.

ANOTHER ADDITION. I like to start many projects at the same time, and often jump to new ones, leaving previous ones. I do finish work, but I often like to do things at the same time. In my completely unprofessional opinion, this may be ADHD. To me it would make sense.

ADDITIONAL - LACK OF SELF CONTROL. Easily distracted, difficulty getting stuff done sometimes. Bad at keeping secrets, not long will I blab the secret, but I will say, 'oh I wasn't supposed to tell you that.' I just don't think about some stuff sometimes. It just doesn't occur to me.