Chapter 10. Back to school #2

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Tw mentions of a past attempt, and self harm.

Third person POV: It's Monday but it's also parent teacher conference day so there's no school which means you have time to tell your friends what happened. When you get back to your dorms no one's awake yet so you text the GC between you kami kiri and Mina. The text reads 'when you wake up come to my dorm we need to talk' around an hour goes by and Mina replies 'omw" it doesn't take long before she's at your door

First person POV: I open the door for Mina and my heart is racing. She walks in, sits on my bed, and says "what's wrong" Without trying to preface it I say "I tried to kill myself four days ago" She looks at me for a minute then gives me a hug "you did" she asks in a sad voice. "Mhm" I say in an even sadder one. Over the next thirty minutes she comforts me hugs me and makes it clear that she's happy I made it. Then kiri and kami come in to see her holding me and they both say "gay" I smile and give little laugh but Mina gives them a face and they can tell it's serious. "What's going on" asks kiri. "Yeah we're here for you guys no matter what now start talking" kami says. I take a deep breath and say "four days ago I was in the hospital... due to a suicide attempt" silence falls over the room until kami hugs me and say "we wouldn't know what to do if we came to school and you weren't there." Kiri joins in too and says "I'm so happy you made it" After the hug breaks kami says "can you tell us why" "I was tired of the pain" I say simply. "How...did you make the attempt" asks kiri. "Pills" respond. "Y/N you're going to start eating enough food again right" Mina asks. I nod but I'm my peripheral vision I see kami and kiri going wide eyed at me. "Are you ok with talking about it. it's perfectly okay if not." Says kiri. "Yeah I can talk about it, I've just so awful for around a month and after a while I just couldn't handle it anymore. I'd daydreamed about how to do it several times so, when the time came I already knew what method I'd use. I got a large cup of water and handful by handful I took the pills till there weren't any left." I say. After a minute of silence kami asks "did we say something to cause it" "No. this had absolutely nothing to do with you. I just couldn't handle what I was feeling so I tried to take the easy way out." I reply. A silence falls over the room and it remains there.

Third person POV: What Mina kiri and kami don't know is that them simply having shown concern about your attempt was all you ever wanted to hear. When it's time for breakfast kami and kiri sit with you and Mina, At lunch they both pay more attention to you, and after school they praise you for eating dinner. Every thing they do touches you deeply, you never thought that after what happened with your ex best friend you'd be able to trust and care about anyone like you used to but they'd proven you otherwise. When you go to sleep that night you don't think about self harm nor your attempt, you think about them and everything they mean to you and as you drift off to sleep a pure smile. Not a fake one but a genuine smile is plastered across your face for the first time in what feels like forever.

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