The Checklist (Explicit Version)

Chapter 9

   Nellie stared at me silently. "Was he good?"

   Her curiosity made me grin. "Very good." Hearing that, she softened her face before sitting on the edge of my bed. "How did you know..."

   "Hun, you guys were still going at it when I got home."

   I flinched and slapped myself in the face. "Did Val—"

   "Her car wasn't in the driveway when I got home. And your dude left less than an hour later. I don't think she came home last night, to be honest."

   There was a part of me that was worried. Why didn't Val come home? Was she okay? But I did my best to withhold the urge to text and ask. At least, for now.

   "So," Nellie began slowly, and I knew I had to prepare myself for what she had to say next. "Are you still talking to that guy? Myles?"

   Knowing where this was going, I tightly smiled. "Nels—"

   "Seriously, Allie?" She gaped when she read my guilty expression. "You're still talking to him? After what he did?"

   "He explained himself," I weakly defended. "He said he grew up in a bad area and wears a gun to protect himself. He feels bad." Well, he didn't say that, but I know he did.

   She arched a brow. "But he's still going to hold it? Carry it around you? Did you even try to compromise?"

   "Not explicitly—"

   "Allie," she cried in frustration and disappointment. "What if, God forbid, you startle him and he pulls a gun on you? What if his reflexes are too fast, and he doesn't realize that he shot you until it's too late?"

   Her words painted a visual in my mind. Her chin tilted in satisfaction when I flinched.

   "I'll talk to him," I said after a moment, taking her words to heart. "Don't worry. I know how to take care of myself. He means well, Nels. I know he looks a little... cold, but I promise he's really sweet when he opens up. Okay, not really sweet, but he's different than how he looks. I told you he helped me get home that night." He defended me in front of Remi. He walked to the club with me when I couldn't get on his motorcycle. He's given me his hat. He watched Toy Story, even though he adamantly stated he'd never watch Disney. And despite him stupidly starting a fight, he did it because he felt defensive for me. 

   But I didn't say those things, because somehow, they felt more personal.

   Nellie's shoulders sagged before letting out a defeated sigh. "I just don't want you to make any stupid mistakes that you might regret."

   "Anything can be a mistake, Nels," I told her with a small smile. "If you don't do something just because you might regret it later, life would be really, really boring."

   "But it'd also be safe," she retorted.

   "Safe is boring." Throwing the blanket off me, I stood from my bed with wobbly legs. I was grateful that I slipped into shorts and a tee before falling asleep. "I think ending things with Remi made me realize how I've been playing everything safe. I wanna take risks, you know?"

   She watched me silently, and I knew she didn't completely agree. Still, I stopped in front of her and held her shoulders while tipping my head back, so our eyes remained locked.

   "If you don't get it, at least support me. This is our last semester, and I wanna end it with a bang. Literally."

   That forced a grin out of her. "I hope the sex sexually liberates you, Allie. And I'd kill a bitch for you, so make sure you tell that to anyone who thinks it's smart enough to hurt you while you... take risks."