sexual optimist || minsung

#2 mindless thoughts

'life feels like a burden i'm on the verge of dropping.'

»»— *. ・. * ・☆ . . ・☾. * ・☆. *・.* ・. —««

unlike the boisterous thunder fissuring through the clouds stained with grey- emanating emotions of a ruthful concussion, han jisung's mind was echoing empty.

it was third period, calculus, one of the most mourning subjects- as stated by a majority of students. due to it's necessity of challenged study, jisung was bound to pay attention- however, he couldn't get himself to.

the sound of the teachers nullified voice in a monotone, naturally faded out of his attention. all he could legitimately do, was boringly let his gaze fall upon the window he was seated next to.

he watched as droplets of water raced down the glass panes. feeling as though they're movement was the most interesting thing he could divert his attention towards.

maybe because the slow plummeting of the raindrops, reminded of his own unwanted memory sinking into his senses.

he tried everything he could to regain the night he lost his virginity. how he'd awoken in a foreign room alone with no sighting of anybody. how he realized he was naked, soon enough to feel a pounding ache creak into his skull. the aftermath of the party he was forced into was a definite ache.

despite it all, one thing he couldn't recall was how things transitioned after he was spiked. he could barely remember what caused him to fall into the traps of losing his virginity.

but don't get him wrong- no, because he carried pride in whatever had transitioned the previous night.

he couldn't recall a name, a face or even a familiarity of the specimen; because his mind couldn't gauze over the fact at how enlightened his soul felt.

in spite it being his first night; he had to admit, it was the best fuck he'd experienced.

maybe it was because his first, and most probably his last, whatever it had been chained to- it was sensational. he started to question whether the particular person who made him feel on top of a cloud nine belonged to his batch-mates.

he didn't recall a lot, except how his back was arched and throat was stung from moaning. the wondrous despicable ride of emotions he'd been taken on, while he felt the soul crushing thrusts absolutely numb his senses.

god, just thinking back to it, had him abruptly skipping one of his leg up and down while he feverishly sucked on the tip of his pen.

later realizing his absurd act, he strayed the pen from his mouth and stopped bouncing his leg, throwing the pen down while burying his face into his desk.

he knew he shouldn't have ever agreed to the stupid party his best friends dragged him into, yet at the same time, he wondered if he'd be any different of a person if he hadn't lost his virginity.

atleast his rumors were proved wrong, right?

»»— *. ・. * ・☆ . . ・☾. * ・☆. *・.* ・. —««

"hey sung, i got you a smoothie fo— oh, woah.."

on cue of one of his best friend, seungmin's voice, jisung finally took the motivation to lift his head and stretch his arms out towards the raspberry smoothie the specimen had held out.

hesitantly handing his friend the prescribed drink, the brunette seated on the chair across him, worriedly examining the heavy eye bags and uncombed hair. "has the hungover not worn out yet?" he asked, perplexed at how long his friend had been like this.