Me & My Watty-Ways

12. There It Goes as It Comes Along

12. There It Goes Goes as It Comes Along

Dear Friend,

May 25th, 2013,

I don't think school is meant to be a place of turmoil or confusion-- especially if you include the drama. However, if you include the people who make things seem corrupt, well, you know. It just gets worst from there. I mean, it's hard enough when you sit there and try to figure yourself out for the sake of others, but it's even worst when the damn populars or jocks make things even more difficult.

Word spread out today that Pattie started dating Jacob Grayson, who used to have a boyfriend-- J.J Lee. J.J was a nice, decent Asian boy, and was the only gay in S.N.C.P. It didn't bother anybody since we all knew it was 2013, and hate was meant to be in the past. That's what Bruce even pointed out to everyone a few days ago. He said, "We're a family of one. Not one person, but many people who mold together into a whole family of creativity."

Personally, I thought it was a little weird by the way he said 'mold', but I don't think anyone else notice. (To me, it made me think of sex or something exotic. All thanks to the way he gestured his oddly shaped hands.)

So, Pattie and Jacob weren't the only two rumors the spread throughout the school, but so were Dawson and Mitchel. Apparently, one of the cheerleaders caught them making-out under the bleachers, and it probably ruined the moment. Of course it did. It had to.

It was rather sudden to some, but to others, it was expected. I didn't know how to feel since Dawson and Mitchel barely spoke to each other. I mean, what if the rumor wasn't true? What if it was, but they weren't ready to announce it yet? That would be unbelievably humiliating. For anyone, and everyone else who talked about it because they would be told to just "shut the hell up!" by one of them.

Anyway, I thought of maybe just not saying anything to either one of them-- but it was undoubtedly difficult. I swear, at a point, I just wanted to yell out for the day to just end since one of them would end up in my classes. Like for example, for Algebra, Dawson was in my class-- and Mitchel was in my Life Science class. It was infuriating.

I finally decided that during lunch break, I would talk to Dawson. Instead, I spoke to Mitchel. I sat with him, J.J, Sam, and Jared (who was half African-American and half Japanese). Jared and I didn't speak much, but he and Bruce were always talking to each other when they had the chance to. Of course, he and I would give the occasional, "hello's" and "bye's", but nothing more than that. He was really nice, but he didn't date much-- even though he was like the 'Zayn Malik' of group of friends by looks --and that surprised anyone. Nonetheless, he did talk to girls, but as friends, mostly.

During lunch, I asked Mitchel if he and Dawson really were dating, and the table grew quiet. I figured that I had set some boundaries between him and I since he just stared at me with his lips tight together. I really pissed him off, I thought. Although, he started chuckle and sighed out.

"Dude, seriously? You too?" he asked, taking a sip of his Pespi. I just looked at him as Sam shook his head and leaned forward against the table to rest his arms down. Mitchel then spoke to me again and said, "The thing is, if we were dating, we would've said it proudly. That's the thing, Finn."

I guess it's safe to say that I had no idea what he meant, and I guess my facial expression reflected that. I guess that's probably why Sam and Jared burst into a flood of chuckles and snorts before Mitchel looked at them. They did stop, but they still smirked. I felt oblivious to every little thing that was happening. Then I asked, "So, you're not dating?"

"Want a prize?" Mitchel teased.

"But-- you guys were--"

"Rumors spread from idiots, you know. Think of paparazzi."

And for some reason, at that point, things didn't seem to make sense anymore. All those soft whispers that they would exchange to one another, the longing stares or quick glances, the blushes-- I was a complete fool. Until, then he said, "Finn you're so blind, man. Don't you get it yet, at all?"

I shook my head. "No."

That's when he told me, "Dawson likes you, idiot. She always has since day one. She just never said it to anyone but me. And Bruce--and Sam. That's all."

It was all still unclear to me. Yet, I could totally understand what he was saying. I mean, it's not that Dawson isn't pretty, heck, she is. She's...amazing, period. But it made me wonder if I had been the reason to her being so distant and quiet when around me. It's only been a couple of weeks since I've been in S.N.C.P, and I had broken up with Colleen since last month. It was a rush, but somehow, I didn't mind it. Maybe I was the fool. I could damn myself!

I hadn't said anything to anyone else after that, and throughout the rest of my day, I had been trying my hardest to not look at Dawson. She had to feel guilty for the rumors, and I knew it was hard for her enough if I avoided her. And yet, she still kept me intrigued. It wasn't any type of science that could understand our situation, but I knew it was complicated enough.

After school was over, we had rehearsals in the auditorium. Bruce was the director-- obviously --and he assisted that I'd be the 'Executive Producer' since I had not an ounce of talent in acting in my body. (I don't say I could blame him for making that obvious to me, point blank.) I was a hopeless cause to actors everywhere, if you knew what I mean. I'd be the kid in the play that is always the tree, a rock, or the back end of every other animal.

So, basically, the musical is about hopeless people who have no sense in their lives-- whatsoever, and they're on the pursuit of their lives to actually make a statement against all the people who top over them. (It's not 'The Pursuit of Happyness' starring Will and Jaden Smith. It's just a nice play.) Dawson plays the role of the female protagonist, J.J is the lead male protagonist, and everyone else is either a supportive role-- or their the antagonists.

The songs Bruce chose for them to sing were rather remembering, and kept in-touch with the more youthful audience. Just saying, but tell me how many high school students would want to see a musical? Probably none.

Anyway, the songs were from artists that sing today such as, Ariana Grande or Adelle-- maybe even OneRepublic --and some songs were from artists like, Elvis or The Beatles. It didn't truly matter.

I think what really did matter was the fact that everything was falling into place as it should've been. So, I'm not sure if I will be able to write to you so much this week since Bruce is having us rehearse almost every chance we get as the third of June draws near. That's all I can say.--

Sincerely,

Finn