After I exploded Dudley, I was still in the wheelchair, I had to come up with a plan to burn the place down to the ground 😤😤.
"HAGRID", I yelled very loudly whilst still flying at mock 3.
I quickly zoomed my 70-year-old booty cheeks to Hagrid's place. I surprisingly I still didn't know how to stop the wheelchair. Last time it sourta just never stopped itself. So, I absolutely obliterated the wall of Hagrid's house. But I must have been senile because Hagrid had died 40 years ago. But luckily, I found a 469-gallon canister of gasoline in the corner. So, I tied it to the wheelchair (which I somehow got it to stop), with a non-excitant rope, then jumped up into it and flew off into the distant.
As I was flying, I saw Herman's dead body by a door. Me being the bada** I am I flipped her off and said.
" Ehhh I never liked that f***ing b**ch anyway."
So, I got above Hogwarts whilst dogging dementors and took the cap off the opening in the canister, and poured the gas all over Hogwarts, drizzling it like a cake. i then took my magic wand and said "Firey thighs and flaming eyes, torch my nursing home and bring its demise"
the nursing home went up in flames, along with my wife and kids. but I forgot to plan an escape route, so I got trapped in there too I fell off the wheelchair, dramatically screaming,
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!🥵🥵"
But at that time I thought of a wonderful spell. So I pulled out my wand *witch was the elder wand * and screamed,
"Bubbly wubbly publy shmubly!!"
and broke the wand it halve and ate one halve , and put the other up my thick 70-year-old buttocks, this would give me diarrhea and when the two parts meet, I dump out a giant poop bubble and bounce off the roof.
(TO BE CONTINUED)
YOU ARE READING
Harry potter and the prisoner of the nursing home
Fantasy(Satire) Harry potter but he is 70 join me on the adventures of the nursing home... (All ideas and characters go to jk Rowling I didint come up with that stuff I just Frankensteined it together with my crazy ideas (that was so...
