· Serena: This is the first time I've seen you look in the mirror all summer. Here I thought if you did you'd turn to stone. Must be pretty nervous about something if you're willing to take that risk.
Chuck: Ha ha, Sis. I'm on my way out to Lily Pond. With the triplets returning to Rio I thought I'd continue my tour of South America. Maybe Argentina.
Serena: Then what are the flowers for? You wouldn't perhaps have heard a recent phone call with a certain best friend of mine. Who mentioned she's on her way of here on the Jitney.
Chuck: What's a Jitney?
Serena: If that's your way of saying No then I'm glad to hear it. 'Cause Blair will never forgive you for what you did to her.
Chuck: Who told you that little piece of advice, your boyfriend Nate?
Serena: Nate didn't say anything.
Chuck: Good. 'Cause I don't think it's wise taking relationship advice from somebody in a fake relationship. Call me crazy. Enjoy another night alone with your thoughts.
Serena: Good luck on your suicide mission.
· Blair: The only thing lamer than dating Dan Humphrey is mourning Dan Humphrey.
· Eric about Chuck: He's got a PI on speed dial.
Serena marching over: Nate!
Eric: I know that face. That face is not your friend.
· Blair: Charles. Sidebar.
Chuck: Actually we weren't finished.
Blair: Notice how my voice didn't go up at the end. Not a question.
· Serena: Wait, so does this mean you actually think Dan has a redeeming quality?
Blair: Well as long as he knows his arse from his Arsenal I think he's aces.
· Blair: This party's a complete bust. My whole life's a bust.
Serena: Well it serves you right. You were scheming to convince Marcus you're someone you're not.
Blair: But my intentions were good. I really do like him, I just— As soon as I knew he liked me I would have relaxed and dropped the manipulative plotting and devoted myself to being the best girlfriend ever.
Serena: See? Thank you! There's my B. Show this girl to Catherine and she'll want you to be with Marcus. This is you, just be yourself.
Blair: She made Waldorf rhyme with Spears. I may as well have gone commando and held my party at Nyla's Burger Basket. .
· Serena: Why can't you support me?
Blair: Have you two talked about everything? About all the very real reasons you broke up last year?
Serena: Not completely.
Blair: Well when you do, if you're still together, I'll be happy for you. 'Til then I just think you're fooling yourselves.
· Serena: Who was that?
