xiv

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CHARLOTTE POV.
MAY 1, 2022. 

Everything between me and Mason was smooth sailing. Calm waters. He occasionally spent the night at my house, saying that he slept better in my bed than he did in his own. One time as we were in bed, playing with his hair I asked, 

"Are you sure it's the bed?" 

"Nope. The bed's just an excuse. I just enjoy waking up with you next to me." 

Being somewhat of an early bird, I would always wake up first and make breakfast for the both of us. I noticed just how frequently he was staying over at my place when I opened the fridge one day to discover that there was barely anything left, even though I had gone grocery shopping less than a week ago. It made sense— not only was there one more person eating the food, but he ate much more than I did. But it was strange, setting out two sets of plates and buying double the amount of food I usually would for myself. 

It was almost like a routine now. He would drive me to work, then he would go home to get ready for training. We did this a couple times a week. Sometimes I would sleep over at his place, but the routine was still the same. In my bedroom bathroom, there were now two toothbrushes instead of one. There was a little corner in my closet where Mason put his clothes sometimes. And the same was true for his place. I had a little basket in his closet where I put my things. Some would say that we were moving fast, since it was not two weeks since we went on our first date. 

The two of us never talked about what happened that night. The night on which we had been the closest to having sex. I knew that I had probably put him in a strange and somewhat confusing position— I had been giving him all the signs but I had pulled away at the last minute. Judging by his reaction and how he pretended if nothing had happened, or was going to happen, I assumed that he respected my boundaries. When I told Lily what had happened, her reaction was not what I had expected. 

- So you're telling me that you almost had sex, but then you pushed him away right before? 

"Yeah." 

- Shouldn't he be apologizing to you? He tried to push you beyond your boundaries.

"I don't think so. I mean, the moment I broke the kiss he stopped and nothing happened for the rest of the night. Also, I lowkey gave him all the signs that we were going to have sex. So I can't really blame him." 

- But still. Shouldn't you guys be talking about it, instead of pretending it never happened? 

"What's to talk about? Oh, sorry that I pushed you away right before we had sex. My bad." 

- Ok, when you say it like that it sounds super weird. But it's not healthy not to talk about it, Charlotte. Considering that the two of you are practically living together. 

"We are not." 

- Please. When I went to your house last week, your room smelled like a man's cologne. Wait. Hold on. If you guys haven't had sex yet, then whenever you stay over at each other's houses, what do you guys do?

"Eat. Talk. Watch movies. Play games. Sleep. I dunno. Everything except sex, I guess." 

- I can't believe you guys have sleepovers like that without sex. He must be dying. 

"Do you think so?"

- Are you kidding? Have you seen yourself? You're literally out of any man's league. Also, there's no way that he doesn't want sex. I mean, c'mon. But just because he probably wants it bad doesn't mean that you're entitled to give into him, you know that, right? I don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with and end up getting hurt. 

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