A Birdie Lost in Time | Bucky Barnes

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"I agree, but if that's what she wanted, we have to respect that."

"So should I stop looking for her?"

"No, keep looking. I think reaching out and reminding her that you're there is a good thing, but don't be too upset if she wants to stay away. That might just be what she needs."

Marlow nodded, turning her head back to the street. "I just want to know if she's okay... God, I hope Tony's programs work."

"Me too," Bucky agreed quietly before falling quiet. "So... Stark Industries, huh?"

She bit her lip and nodded once. "Mhmm."

"Why didn't you say anything? A job there would be a great opportunity."

A job.

"Yah," she breathed, "I guess."

"What? You don't think so?"

She traced her gaze down the building opposite of them in thought. "I don't know... I guess it is. But... I don't know. Getting back into something like that, where people are relying on me, and I have responsibilities... I don't think I can do it. It's taken me all of this time just to get back to semi-normal after Germany, I can't be pulling shit like that with a job."

"Pepper would understand."

"Maybe, but I don't want that. I don't want people to have to understand, I just want to be functioning. I want to help, and get back to normal, I just don't know if I can handle it..." she bit in frustration.

"I'm sure Pepper would be willing to offer you work when you're ready. Don't feel pressured to take it now."

"I wish I was ready..." she said before her conversation with Steve popped into her head. "I've been thinking..." she mumbled hesitantly, "and it might not be a good idea—and I don't even know if I can do it—but I think I want to talk to someone. A therapist, or a psychologist. Someone who can help me figure out how to deal with everything."

From the corner of her eye, she saw Bucky nod.

"I think that's a really good idea," he said gently, and as she turned to look at him, she found an encouraging smile on his lips.

"Do you think you could talk to Raynor? Is she taking patients?"

His face shifted, first to what looked like frustration, and then to passivity. "I'm not seeing her anymore."

Her back straightened. "Wait, stopped it completely? I didn't realize that was what you meant."

"When everything went down in Baltimore, Walker ended my therapy stipulation."

"Oh," she breathed. "You didn't talk about it... is that okay with you?"

"Wasn't the most pressing matter. I also don't mind not having to sit in a room with a cranky old vet prodding me to tell her my every thought."

She sent him an unamused look and he cracked an awkward smile.

"Sorry, therapy just isn't for me."

"Did it help at all?"

"Sure, I'm an open book now," he stated facetiously, before catching the still unamused look Marlow was sending him. "Sorry," he repeated, "it did. But if I'm being honest, it didn't help as much as Sam did. He put things into perspective, gave me a different outlook. Raynor was helpful with somethings, but the therapy thing just wasn't for me."

She nodded. "So what you're saying is Sam should be your therapist?" she asked with a hint of a smile.

"No, just that he's good at giving advice."