Prophecy of the Nexus

Chapter 18

Sir Atticus shook his head. His vacant eyes scared me. Was he angry with me? My existence had lost him his adoptive son, so was he mad at me? He seemed like he didn't even want to look at me. "If we did that, demons would swamp me in seconds. I'd lose you both forever."

"How will you find her then?" I nearly shouted at him. My voice pleaded with him to just look at me. To acknowledge that I was someone worth this conversation. Even on our first meeting, he had time for me; why wasn't he looking at me? "She wants me, remember. Marcus is gone because of me." That last sentence scrapped along my tongue like sandpaper. I held back my tears by closing my eyes and took a deep breath. "This all about me, sir. All over some stupid prophecy that I don't even know about."

I opened my eyes. Sir Atticus had come closer to me, and he was finally looking at me. His deep green eyes were again full of that softness I would never expect from a soldier. He wrapped his arms around in what felt like a hug goodbye. It was brief, and a long time ago I would have wished it to last forever, but I knew this wasn't the time for that. Still, the embrace helped calm me down. "You can't come with me," he said, his voice soft. "But, I know you'll follow your heart." And with that, he marched off towards the witches quarters and left me alone with my confused feelings.

The stiff wind whipped at me, but I didn't take any heed of it. I wanted the ground to swallow me up and take me away. Staying outside didn't feel like a smart idea, though. I began walking to the dormitories. As I passed, the recovery squad watched me like vultures. Most of them knew Meredith had attacked the base because of me. Whispers followed me as I walked past them. Soldiers I had never seen before were judging me. How could I command an army if I'm remembered as the Arknight who cause an attack on the Mantle? I walked quicker, wanting this torment to end. The dorms couldn't come any sooner. I rushed into our dorm and headed straight for my room. I collapsed onto my bed and took a minute to let all the pain and ache to leave my body in one rattling croak.

I took a moment to calm myself. The soft sheets were a friendly embrace and free from the staring eyes so I could work through what I was feeling. Guilt, anger, and self-pity were not a good cocktail of emotions to be going through. It was clear that Meredith was a master of her corruption, which made anything I do look like a joke. I still had so much to learn, but I needed to know it now. Doubting myself just made me angrier. It wasn't my fault. She had been a fully trained Arknight before me. I didn't even have a year on my side. Still, my insecurities circled my soul like a pair of snakes hissing at me. You betrayed your friend. He's gone because of you. You let him down. No matter how hard I pushed them away. They seemed to always slither back.

I rolled over, my hand searching beneath my bed. I pulled out the walkie-talkie. As I grabbed it, my hand poked something sharp. I also draw out my demonheart. The small gem began to glow gently, sending out its message for all witches to see. I didn't mind it much thought and instead focused on the walkie-talkie. Dialling channel six, I whispered, "Alice, are you there?" I was met with only static. I realised Alice properly didn't have her walkie-talkie on her. The civilian population were only just being released from the bunkers as the last team of Arknight sweeps the city for any lost demon. That meant I was alone with my thoughts.

I tried to think what Marcus would do if I had been taken instead of him. Would he have followed sir Atticus' orders or challenged him? I was sure he wouldn't let me go without trying to find me. He would have taken the Squires if he needed backup. As I thought about Marcus, sir Atticus' words rolled around my head. Follow your heart. The last time I followed my heart, I got shouted at by Sir Atticus, and the time before that, I failed to capture a demon. So I didn't know what Sir Atticus meant by that. I rolled the demonheart around my palm. I sighed and looked down at it. Gazing down at the heart, a plan began to form in my head. It was a stupid plan, one where there was a small chance of success. But my stupid plans had worked out so far. I needed to get to the Halo.