The Meeting

I'm Done

It was true, right now I wasn't really sure why Leah and I were even trying. It was obvious that neither of us were happy, our marriage wasn't working, and we hadn't had so much as a cuddle in months. Everyone said it wouldn't last forever, maybe they were right. I picked the kids up, not bothering to go home between each pick up time, instead Finn, Theo and I went to the park. Watching the two play without a care in the world, with no idea that Leah and I were in such a bad place, was difficult. I knew that Leah wouldn't be there when we got home, I knew that she would come home later and spend time with the children before she took herself to bed, or stayed up late enough for me to already be asleep when she got to bed. Once Aoife was out of school, we called into the shop before making our way home, a text from Leah coming through just before I drove off.

Leah
Leave the kids to my Mum's please. She's going to take them tonight.

I knew in that moment what was going on, and the fact that Leah had told her Mum that we needed to have this talk cemented that maybe it was over after all. I didn't text her back, just continued to drive towards her Mum's house, letting the kids know that they were having a sleepover. The innocence of children to be excited about the idea, without knowing what would be happening in their home tonight brought a tear to my eye. Amanda opened the door as I pulled up, I wasn't sure I could face her so I simply watched as the children ran from the car to the door, running straight into the arms of their uncle Jacob. Amanda is walking towards me, here we go. She opened the door of the car, getting into the passenger seat and placing her hand on top of mine on the steering wheel.

"Are you okay, Alex?" She asked softly.
"Yeah."
"You can talk to me, you know that don't you? I'm here for you just as much as I am for Leah."
"I know, thank you." I choked back my tears.
"Has something happened? Is there someone else?"
"No, of course not. Well, not on my part anyway. We just aren't getting along, we fight every day over absolutely nothing, we blame each other for anything that goes wrong. We aren't a team anymore. I don't know when things got this way, I didn't even notice it happening - like how do you not notice something like that?"
"We aren't designed to have perfect marriages, Alex. That's something you and Leah haven't really had to deal with. You have both had big moments, like after Aoife was born - but it's harder when there's no reason for it. Don't give up on Leah, because I know she won't ever give up on you."
"I think she already has, Amanda." I let a tear fall.
"Just go home, and talk. Don't get yourself in a whole state before you get home. You never know what might happen." She smiled.

I was grateful for Amanda, I knew she was thinking that I didn't have a Mum to talk me through any of this. I did wonder how Leah felt about it though, it must be difficult to know that your Mum felt she couldn't take sides in an argument because she didn't want your wife to feel alone, I'm not sure I would've been as okay with it as Leah seemed to be.

I drove home slowly, dreading what was to come. Stopping outside the house and waiting in the car to gather myself, the last thing I wanted to do was walk in crying and start the conversation off on a negative. By the time I got inside, the smell of food filled the house, music coming from the kitchen as I made my way towards it. Before I reached the door of the kitchen, Leah appeared in the doorway, a small smile imprinted on her face.

"I've ran you a bath, Al. Food will be ready for you getting out." She said softly.
"Okay, thanks." I wasn't really sure what this was.

I made my way upstairs, finding a bath filled with bubbles and candles placed around the bathroom. I chuckled as I looked at the steam filled mirror that Leah had written I miss you in with her finger, my heart warming as I realised that this was clearly her attempt at making this better; Amanda telling me to settle myself and go home earlier that day making sense. I found myself able to relax in the bath for the first time in months, not feeling as tense as I had before. After my bath, I made my way back downstairs, making my way into the kitchen to see Leah who was still stressfully cooking and trying her best to make sure everything was perfect. I sat at the island before speaking, Leah intently watching for any sign of what was going on in my head.