Hide Your Fires

23: So Random

"So let me tell you a story," Allison tells me as a greeting on Monday morning at my locker.

I nod at her, pulling out my school bag. "Alright, I'm all ears."

"So, I was on the Birmingham website last night to see how you did at the fashion show since I didn't want to wait until today to find out how you did. By the way, it totally sucks that you didn't win, I really thought that you had it in the bag. Anyway, so I was looking through the designer profiles, since you had one of those because you were one of the designers, as you know."

I nod again, shutting my locker and then we walk together down the crowded hallway of tired and grumpy teenagers as we all prepare for a Monday morning of classes. "Yes, I'm aware."

"And on your profile, it showed a bunch of pictures that they'd taken of you and your guests there. Your brothers were there, naturally, and Matt is as adorable as ever," Allison tells me and I can already see where this is going now. "But you can imagine my surprise when I saw Tate Conner there with his arm wrapped around her waist like you were best friends. What. The Heck. Hallie?"

"Yeah, we're kind of friends now," I inform her quietly, not really ready for the reaction that I'm about to get from Allison, who has been slightly invested in Tate's life ever since he showed up from reform school. I'd always thought that it was weird because it's not like our whole school is insanely invested in Tate. Granted, he's popular and known as kind of a badass/womanizer/jerk, people don't stare at him down the hallways or try to steal samples of his DNA. Just like people know (or at least they think) that I'm a brooding Barbie. Like Tate, they know of my existence, they know of my reputation, but I'm not a celebrity.

"Kind of?" She wonders persistently.

"Yes," I laugh. "Kind of. But, I guess that I should tell you that we're going on a date this weekend."

"Define 'date'," She demands.

I just shrug. "I don't know, dinner and a movie? Holding hands, giggling, all of that stuff."

"Will there be kissing?"

Again, I shrug cluelessly. "I don't really know, most likely, I guess."

"Holy crap. Do you even realize how lucky you are right now? Like, can I just be you?" She starts firing rhetorical questions at me. At least, I hope that they're rhetorical. With Allison though, I'm never really sure. "And so this is why he's been so calm as of late."

"Calm? What do you mean?" I wonder curiously.

"I mean ever since The Slap incident in the hallway, he's been flying under the radar when it comes to the female population of the school. No broken hearts, no one night stands, barely any partying at all. It's because he's finally found a girl worth reforming for."

"Do you ever just take a step back and realize how scarily creepy you are?" I ask her with a small laugh.

"No, because if I did that, I might start to hate myself. I'm just going to ignore how creepy I am until I eventually grow out of it," She informs me as if that's the most normal reply ever. "Anyway, although I am painfully jealous of you, I am also very happy for you. You must tell me how he kisses."

"I'll think about it," I laugh again and then I say goodbye to her right before disappearing into my first period class. I text Tate a lot when I'm in class but I don't see him at all during the first half of the day. I want to tell myself that I'm completely unbothered by that but to be honest, it's a bit disappointing because after our sketchy farewell on Saturday night, we haven't seen each other.

At lunch, I go in to the art room with Erin even though I know that he has the same lunch period as me. I don't want to come off as suffocating or creepily invested in him. Basically, I don't want to act like Allison in this situation. I have to play it cool. As I'm staring down at my blank sketchpad, I roll my eyes at myself, not really believing that I sound like a self-conscious middle schooler. I sound pathetic.