Author's Note (The Villain Series 1)

Kabanata 33

"I'm not being a coward. I am just saving myself from extreme heartache. We don't feel the same toward each other, so I might as well stop here and move on."

"Idiot!" Napatampal ito sa noo. "How can that save you from extreme heartache? If Gonietta will find herself a boyfriend, you'll still suffer anyway!"

"Not if I move on." He was about to stand up to cut their conversation but he froze on the next thing he said.

"Can you really move on?!" Tinuro siya nito. "The color of your emotion is at extremes. They were genuine. And genuine feelings don't fade easily. When you choose to move on, you will still be caught up in pain at some point and be heartbroken. Because you have that vulnerability towards my reddy readsy, you're going to face heartbreak even if you don't want to, Logan."

Natahimik siya. He knew it wouldn't be easy. It was impossible to forget someone in a day after loving them for years, after all. He was perfectly aware he'd face heartaches while moving on, but he chose to ignore that fact. Who knows? Heartaches would ignore him too.

But still, it was impossible. Adamas was right. There were never zero heartaches in moving on.

"What's the difference between moving on and preventing yourself from extreme heartaches?" He leaned against the sofa. "Your decision should be to confess first, moving on will come after her answer. Lucky you if it's yes, you won't need to worry about having heartbreaks alone because you'll deal with it with her. It's do or die, Logan. You will get hurt, anyway so secure that confession. Get hurt if you must."

"But . . ." Mariin siyang napapikit. May tama na naman ulit itong sinabi. Kahit mag-confess siya o hindi, masasaktan pa rin siya.

Argh. This villain really had a way with his words. Now, he was contemplating whether he should confess or not.

Buo na dapat kanina ang desisyon na titigil na siya pero itong kasama niya masiyadong maraming sinasabi.

"No buts, human. You will confess to her!"

"Now, you're deciding for me." He sighed. "What if I will just ruin everything between us?"

"You're confessing not to be accepted nor ruin your friendship, but you want to speak what you really feel regardless of her answer." He crossed his legs and smiled. "My Noa always tells me to voice out what we feel. In that way, we will always be heard, miscommunication will not foster, and we'll open up unexpected opportunities. Words can change a life, after all. You know that better than anyone, Logan. Because you're a writer like my wordy Noa."

"You're comparing me to Miss Noa. She's on a whole different level than me."

"Of course she is! You can never beat her. She is the best!" Ngumisi ito, bakas sa mukha nito ang saya sa tuwing binabanggit ang manunulat. "But you're not bad. How long have you been writing?"

"For a long time. I've been writing since grade four."

"Then you'll be okay. Just continue to do well. Your foundation is already at its peak. You don't need to chase your dreams anymore. It will come to you instead. After all, ambition loves passionate people."

"You're speaking again as if you know what will happen in the future."

Humalakhak naman ito. "Trust me."

Adamas snapped his fingers to disperse his thread after cleaning the entire room. 

"So are you going to confess or not?"

"You already decided for me. Do I have another choice?"

Napangiti si Adamas sa kaniyang sinabi. Ganoon din siya.

He may be a fool for trying again despite receiving a rejection. Even though he already knew what she felt toward him, he'd still give it a shot. Siguro hindi na siya aasa pang iba ang isasagot nito, basta ang mahalaga, masabi niya ang kaniyang nararadaman. Just like what Adamas said, he'd confess not wanting acceptance but conveying his feeling. It'd be better for him too because moving on would be easier if feelings were already expressed out.

"Do it soon, human. I want to witness it."

Napaisip naman siya. When would be the, if not the perfect, but right time? When he could have the opportunity, when no one could interrupt them and where he could speak his heart out?

"Make it grand. I don't want a confession without any effort."

"Wait. Shut up for a minute. Nag-iisip ako."

"How dare you shut me up?" He hissed but proceed to shut his mouth anyway.

Ilang minuto ring naging tahimik ang paligid nang may pumasok sa isip niya. Kaagad niyang kinuha ang phone upang tingnan ang date. Napangiti siya.

It was exactly a week before Gon's birthday.

"I think I know when to confess." Pinakita niya kay Adamas ang calendar ng kaniyang phone. One date was pinned with an occasion. "A week from now, Gon will have her 28th birthday."

"Hmm. A week . . ." Adamas paused. "I think I can still last. What are you going to do?"

"Naisip ko na 'to no'ng isang taon pa. Gon is fond of books and arts. I think she will like it if the theme is centered on that."

"Will it cost you a lot?"

"It will. But I'm already prepared for this day. I already have savings for it." He opened his bank account online and checked the money he saved up for her birthday. "I think this will be enough."

"All right!" Adamas said with a wide smile. He even stood up to show his excitement. "We'll make this birthday the most memorable for her and have you confess!"

"Uh . . . Can I ask you for a favor?" Napakamot siya sa kaniyang batok.

He thought about this surprise before. Gon would be happier if he could bring her favorite fictional character. A cosplayer could do it but it'd be better if it was the real one. It was just wishful thinking not until Adamas showed up.

He might make it happen.

"I don't do favors but if it's for my reddy readsy, go on. Say it."

"You know, Gon's current favorite is Odds of Tribes. Her favorite character is Hamitherion. Do you think you can bring him on her birthday as a surprise?" mahina niyang sabi dulot ng hiya.

"What?! He is my nemesis! Why would you ask me to bring him here? I am not even sure if that sparkly ass man is here," sigaw nito at pabagsak na umupo.

"Okay lang naman kung hindi. Nagbabakasali lang--"

"Did I say no?" Adamas hissed before looking at him. Bakas sa mukha nito ang pagkainis, halatang ayaw nitong gawin ang hinihingi niya. "But I will try. Let's see if I can find him and bring him here without strangling each other's necks."