I - Gabriel

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Gabriel was sitting on a high rooftop, his legs dangling off the edge. Nonchalantly swinging them to the rhythm of a song in his head. A wonderful recall he treasured dearly. It was an old song heard in a forgotten village square, buried deep down in his memory. It was the only clear one he had of that mysterious place. He remembered it as if he were still there even though his memory was becoming increasingly blurry.

The voices of the many traders which overlapped each other in a warm, friendly hubbub. The shining sun high in the sky. Children dancing in the center of the square around a huge wooden pole carved with signs. The flowers with their thousands of colors and smells tightly braided and swinging to the rhythm of their steps. And above all, the blue hair of a young girl, laughing cheerfully, overflowing with energy. Her little legs hopping one after the other to the rhythm of childish songs; her dazzling smile seemed brighter, to him, than all the stars of the universe.

The music stopped in his mind and Gabriel returned to reality.

He watched the winding alleys darkened by the falling of the day, his gaze dull, also shadowed. The usual, bright flame of youth, like its vivacity, did not burn within him. As if it had never burned or had been suddenly extinguished without warning.

He talked to no one, had no friends and didn't care. Sometimes he muttered a few phrases to his colleagues, but he didn't take the time to get to know them. His eyes fixed on the ground, his head down, his mood gloomy.

«Who would bother being surrounded if that entourage was doomed to disappear? », he often wondered.

It simply left a gaping hole in those who remained, alive. That was his state of mind.

He felt deeply alone and lived only day by day, without worrying about tomorrow, which was exactly the same as today, yesterday and the day before yesterday. The same routine, the same job, the same hours...

«What a life», he muttered.

Sometimes he told himself that, maybe, there was still a shred of ambition or will left inside him. And that helped him survive one more day. Or was he trying to convince himself that one day he would be able to change the game?

For him, nothing was harder than being stuck in an endless loop. He had nothing to envy, his path seemed only paved with obstacles and his life an immense wall of smooth stones, impossible to climb or break. Probably this was exaggerated, but that was the impression he had of his own life.

Everything he did to alleviate his daily life was to sink into alcohol. When the darkness took possession of his mind, and it was impossible for him to see anything but shadiness, he went to the tavern to drown his soul. His illness would then sleep deeply until the next day. It reassured him to cheat a little when he no longer had the strength to move forward.

The last glimmers of the sun extinguished on the horizon, illuminating for a few minutes the pale features of Gabriel's face. He met his gaze in a window before looking at himself. His face was so hollow that one could have thought he hadn't eaten for days. He tried to remember when his last meal was, but his memory remained blurry. He shrugged; it didn't really matter to him. The drink would quench hunger anyway.

He saw the dark circles around his eyes. He looked at them for a long time without reacting before shrugging again.

The night promised to be fresh and had even already begun to extend its long, dark cloak covered with thousands of stars.

It was at that moment that he decided to leave. He climbed down from his perch to fall on a second roof - a little lower - before sliding down a few meters along a gutter. He held on to the bars of a window, then jumped onto the balcony below.

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⏰ Last updated: Mar 01, 2023 ⏰

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