Keeping up Appearances

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The car merged from the county road onto the expressway, quickly making its way downtown.

Sam pulled into a valet parking spot beside a strip of designer boutiques.

"Sam, we're shopping here?" Lily winced as she exited the car. "I've never stepped foot into one of these stores."

"Today, we are."

Sam took her by the hand and led her through the doors of a shiny black storefront. Lily hung by the foyer, feeling very out of place.

"Sam...this is so not me."

"Relax, Lily. This isn't Pretty Woman."

"Yeah, well, I'm sure she made waay more money as a hooker."

"Oh, dear God...." Sam scolded. "Will you stop it? You need clothes desperately."

Stark black and white, minimal frocks hung from racks braced against white marble slabs. A catwalk took centre stage, with a waiting area tastefully decorated in high-end Italian furniture. Lily took in her surroundings with a sinking feeling. "Maybe we should head on down to the liquidator's mall. Sam, I mean it."

Sam squeezed her hand reassuringly. "It'll be okay, Lily. Promise."

"You say "promise" a lot."

"I wouldn't have to-- if you'd trust me."

"Suuuure. Okay," Lily mocked sarcastically. "Satan."

"Hello! Mr Colman." The store manager interrupted the conversation. She rushed to the foyer, turned the open sign to closed, and quickly locked the door.

"The store is completely yours now! What can we help you with today?" The head lady gushed.

"This lovely woman is in terrible need of a new wardrobe," Sam announced, gesturing to Lily. "As you can see."

"Oh, right away, sir! What is the lady looking for?"

All eyes turned expectantly toward the mortified Lily.

"Uh, those scarves look nice." She answered meekly.

"Those are on sale for $500 apiece." The storekeeper replied excitedly.

"Or maybe not!" Lily whispered hoarsely. She couldn't even afford two socks in this place!

Sam pulled a credit card from his wallet.

"She can have whatever she wants." He smiled. "See to it."

"I've never seen a black credit card before," Lily whispered. "Is that like the Prince of Darkness exclusive charge card?"

"Wow, talk about no filter," Sam murmured with bemusement. "Remember, we're incognito."

"His real name is Satan," Lily told the confused shopkeeper. "And I'm his rotten demoness."

"Uh, that's her pet name for me," Sam answered awkwardly. "I'll admit, it's a bit--odd."

"It's because he's such a bad boy." Lily wrapped an arm around his waist, winking naughtily.

"Sam Coleman?" The shopkeeper giggled. "Of course he is! I read the gossip columns!"

"Gossip?" Lily answered impishly. "Tell me more."

Sam fought back a wave of embarrassment. "Lily, we haven't the time for that."

You're so bratty! His voice penetrated her mind.

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