Changing Kitty

Chapter 11

“Forgive me, I’m sorry,” he apologised quickly, wrapping his arms around her securely. Kitty enjoyed the feeling of being in his arms. It allowed her to calm herself after the horrendous thought. “It is what I mentally prepare myself for. I know I will see blood, so I expect the worst and hope for the best.”

Kitty closed her eyes as she leant against his chest. “I would not care if I lived on ten thousand pounds a year or ten pounds a year. This feeling, this all consuming feeling, I have is worth more than every penny I’ve ever had.”

She felt his lips brush the top of her hair. “I leave in five days. I will be gone for months and even then I am not sure when I will return to England.”

“Why don’t you retire?” Kitty suggested already knowing the answer.

“My sweet, the navy is all I’ve ever known. What will I do if I retire?” he asked her.

“Do not call me that,” Kitty said quickly. “It is what my papa calls my mama whenever he is trying to be romantic.” She shuddered. “But, you could do what my papa used to do. Become a solicitor.”

“Something that does not involve me sitting in an office,” he laughed. “My mother had a hard enough time teaching me how to read and write when I was a boy. All I did was want to be out on the water with my father,” he recalled happily.

“Why don’t you do that then? Become a fisherman,” she prompted. “Or, if you do not want to leave the navy completely, become one of the men that trains the cadets in England – there are those sorts of men, aren’t there?”  

“I’ll find something to do,” he assured her. He touched her cheek again softly. “If I was a better man I would tell you to find someone else. You are far too young to be tying yourself to someone like me.”

Kitty rolled her eyes. “Someone like you? What is wrong with you, pray tell?” 

“It would be easier for you to marry a man like your father ... a man who will inherit a grand estate and has a house full of servants,” he sighed.

“That would be easier,” Kitty nodded. “And a man like my father is perfect ... but I wouldn’t be happy with that, as I won’t be happy with anyone but you. You are perfect for me. I know you’re leaving in five days, but distance does not matter.”

Captain Aubrey smiled down at her. “I will return to you,” he promised. “But right now you must return home before your father discovers you’ve left the house without a chaperone. I would escort you but I can’t leave my men. I want you to walk straight home, the most direct way, you understand?” he instructed and Kitty nodded. “Do not stop to talk to anyone.”

Kitty bit her lip nervously. “I don’t want to be presumptuous,” she stammered. “But ... are we engaged?”

“I will not propose to you underneath a ramp on a dock. I will propose to you the way you deserve,” he promised her. He leant down and kissed her on the forehead. “I will be at Ethridge later. Do not speak of this to anyone before I have an opportunity to ask your father’s permission.”