Home - COD Simon Ghost Riley X Female OC

Chapter 9

There was not a reality in which this could go on. The newness of a spark with someone, testing them, tasting them, it was a thrill he always sought but it wasn't something meant to last. And he was no dichotomy. Who he was out there and who he was right here were one in the same. Bloody, cruel, incapable of feeling. He had a duty, she was a part of that. Protecting her was a part of that. Knowing her was a part of that. He told her he hadn't wanted to be alone, but really he hadn't want to be apart from her, in the same way he didn't want to drink coffee or take cold showers. It was a discomfort he easily remedied. Being alone was different, it wasn't something to cure, and it didn't change with company.

She had been tucked up against him but turned over onto her side when she fell asleep. Still, her back was against his hip. He listened to her breathing speed up, her body tense as she woke and he was careful not to startle her. He might be cruel, but not to those that didn't deserve it.

MJ was uncomfortable, her shoulder sore from laying on something hard. She woke, listening, but didn't dare move or open her eyes. She was laying on the floor somewhere. Cold. The past few weeks must have been a dream, then. Her heart sped up so quickly it felt like it would fly out of her chest. How deeply could she have been out to dream up a rescue like that? She listened long enough that she heard no danger and cracked her eyes.

But it wasn't the room she was familiar with, or the smells she hated. It was the bed of a truck. It was dark, the night sky over her head. She sucked a deep breath of cool air. She had left the base with Simon. She must have fallen asleep. She could feel him against her back, still sitting. She rolled onto her back.

"I slept."

"You did." He had one leg pulled up so he could rest an arm on his knee. He had his mask back on. It must be warmer.

"How long?"

"Couple of hours."

She pulled herself up to a sitting position and looked over at him. It wasn't awkward. They were just two faceless people in a desert somewhere, small beneath the expanse of a sky that had seen them both suffer.

He would have to go soon, then. It must be three or four in the morning. She just lay in silence until he spoke again.

"I'll take you back to the base." She wasn't afraid of him. Not at all. But sometimes his coldness was jarring.

She ran her hand over her mouth, trying to recall if his kisses were just a dream or not. They weren't, she knew, because she couldn't dream. She didn't know if she could earn another after not giving him what he wanted. A thought for much later.

"You're leaving soon."

"Yep." He got up and reached for her hand, pulling her to her feet. She was stiff and cold but tried not to let him know.

Of course he knew. He knew every breath she took, every movement. It was his job. Duty. And it would be warmer in the cab. In reality they had stayed out longer than he usually did, but he hadn't wanted to wake her. It was good for him. It was peaceful, it kept him from pacing around and waiting for the others to load up and leave. The outing that night had done it's job. He had told MJ that it made him feel small, and as he opened the door for her and helped her in, he had never felt smaller in his life. He was completely out of control. Every cold, hard thought he had while sitting there as she slept shook loose and he rushed to tuck them back into place before he did something dangerous and stupid. By the time he made it around to the driver's seat, he was composed again and it did not slip one time.

Not as he helped her out of the truck and watched as she walked back inside the building, tossing a "Good luck" and a tired smile over her shoulder at him. Not as he went back to his quarters and laid out his things. He kept complete composure as he met outside the convoy and debriefed with his team and as he sat in his usual spot across from Soap on their way across the desert. He kept it for two days as they infiltrated a camp outside of town and set up base.