The Leap [✔]

Chapter Nineteen

Hate

a powerful word

to describe people we loath

or a word we simply don't mean

but we say it to describe

how hurt we are

during an emotional hype

after we calm down

we regret what we said

after wishing people we love

were dead

hurting them

realizing it was a mistake

to say the words

of destruction

our loved ones ache

from the simple words

they couldn't take.

"I hate you!" Quinn screams again, shoving me weakly. Tears well up in his eyes, but he wipes them away. His words hit me like a ton of bricks. They made me shake with anger. Before my dad can grab either of us, I shove Quinn back, and he stumbles back into the wall.

"I know you do Quinn! You say it all the time!" I scream, throwing up my hands. I've had enough of this kids attitude, deciding to finally give him a piece of my mind. "I just don't know why! Why do you constantly insist that Tyler's death was my fault? He's gone! He's not coming back! Just accept it!"

Tears seep through, running down my cheeks like a waterfall. I don't bother wiping them away.

"He's gone because of you! I can't just accept it! He's dead because you didn't look after him!" Quinn sobs, but his face is full of anger. My mom is in the kitchen, looking at us with tears in her eyes.

Loud stomps come down the stairs, and all my brothers surrounding us. They look about ready to jump in and tackle the two of us, however, before they can do anything, my dad grabs a hold of Quinn, hooking his arms around his forearms.

"If you had looked after him better, he would still be here," Quinn says, pointing his finger at me.

"Sometimes I wish you had died instead of Tyler! We would have been better off," he says, rattling off other insults but I'm not focused on what he's said.

I wish you had died instead of Tyler.

My heart feels like it is breaking. A pain in my chest starts to form, and I looks at Quinn in the eyes. He stops talking, waiting for me to speak. I remember Tyler, laying there in the middle of the road, blood seeping everywhere.

When I found him, he was barely breathing, his face almost unrecognizable because blood covered his face.

"I wish I had died too," I mumble and hear my mom gasp. I see my brothers stiffen. Its obvious nobody expects me to say those words. They are true, they just won't admit it like I will. I would do anything to bring my little brother back, even if it meant I was dead.