A Mug of Hope

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I remember when times were simpler

We could talk about anything and feel perfectly comfortable in each other's company

 Boy...

what would I give to have that back


I don't know when it started

I'm not sure she does either

but slowly... we started to drift apart

She didn't like that I wanted to make my Youtube channel a full-time career and I'll admit that a regular job would absolutely pay more,

but this is my dream, it's what I love doing, and I'm feeling like she's making me choose between two things I love

I do have a part-time job, but it's making me pennies and feels so soul-sucking

So I end up spending a lot of time at home working on my videos

Stacy can do most of her job at home, but even though we're both home so much, we rarely ever talk

and I'm getting tired of being alone


But despite all this, 

I know deep down that she loves me and cares for me even though I know I frustrate her

I know this because.... 

well... 

she makes me tea every day. 


My favorite herbal tea when I'm feeling stressed, and some delicious chai tea when I need a boost

She always makes them just how I like it,  and always uses my favorite mug

Every day at around 3 pm, she'll walk in and place the tea on my desk then leave without saying a word

I always make sure to say thank you and tell her I love her because I'm having trouble finding other ways to say it

To make sure she knows how much I appreciate it, every day I always do the dishes which is her least favorite chore, but I don't know whether or not she sees it, but in a way... 

I don't care 

because I love her.


And I will keep having hope for us and keep trying to make my channel profitable enough to put her financial concerns behind her

And I hope I never ever see the day... when she stops making tea for me

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