Shattered Dreams

EIGHTEEN.

I look at the massive windows that look into the ice rink from the reception and see that it's not busy at all, just a few of the younger skaters. But that's when I see her.

Nadia is floating around on the ice, which is something I haven't seen from her in a while. But it's not the same as it was before, she's skittish on there now whereas before she looked at ease, like it all came naturally to her.

"Here you go," Tina says, holding out my phone for me to take. "You know, if I knew it was your phone then I would've put my number in it when coach Jenson handed it in last night."

I was too busy focusing on Nadia in the ice that I didn't really listen to what she said so I mutter out a quick "Thank you."

I was going to get straight back into my car and drive to the restaurant but with the way Nadia is skating it looks like she needs someone, so I walk towards the doors that lead to the ice rink.

The closer I get to her the more that I can see her struggling and the more she struggles, the more she gets inside of her own head. I take a seat on the bench next to where her things are and Mark comes and joins me a few moments later.

"She's really struggling isn't she?" He whispers to me, as if it's something he's only just realised.

"She has been for a while." I tell him, trying not to let the anger get the best of me.

"I didn't realise it was this bad." He admits, looking to the ground and shaking his head in defeat.

"You did, you just didn't listen to her when she told you." I defend Nadia to him.

"How was I supposed to believe it? I couldn't see anything wrong with her." He says exasperated.

"By believing her. In over a decade when has she ever missed training because she was sick?" I ask him, looking directly in his eyes. "Just because you can't see anything wrong with her doesn't mean there isn't. Usually it's the things we can't see that are the real killers."

"Fuck. You're right, I should go and apologise to her." He says, standing up but I stop him before he does anymore damage.

"I know you care about her coach, but I don't think you should do that. She's still hurt about you kicking her off. Just wait till she's settled down a little first." I suggest, letting go of his arm.

"When did you become so mature?" He cracks a smile.

"When I started seeing how people started treating my best friend's sister." I admit.

"You're still doing that? When are you going to tell her?" He asks, causing me to let out a breathy laugh.

'You can walk away now." I tell him and he holds his hands up in defeat before walking back to wherever the fuck he came from.

I don't know what he wants me to tell her, that I believe her? I already have told her that and I will tell her that over and over again if it means she at least has someone in her corner.

Like I said to her in that stupid letter I wrote her, I'll believe her even when she doesn't believe herself.

It was silly of me to write that to her, I know that now. It was a spur of the moment thing, my emotions of seeing her in pain and upset got the best of me and I wanted to cheer her up. I just hope she doesn't overthink it and make it out to be something it isn't. She tends to do that with a lot of things.

When I see Mark enter the staff lounge I take my eyes off him and focus on the run down skater at the far side of the rink.

She's beautiful. Not just in the way she looks, or the way she talks. Just in the way she is. The girl has the kindest heart, but it's been broken and damaged by everything around her.