My Last Days of Silence | J.JK

15: See the cherry trees blossom

I wished for myself not to withdraw. I had thought about wanting to tell him about my days left and stuff after we would've watched the trees. I was scared, but it only seemed fair. The past few days with my family made me realize that it just wasn't right of me to let Jungkook live without worries only for it to come falling on him all at once. The truth would hurt, but a lie would hurt for longer.

Today I would tell him.

I got out of the bus and walked a little down the street at a slow pace. I had to be careful of my weak lungs not to run out of air. I already felt my body grow tired.

I wore a lighter jacket than usual, being the sunbeams warmed the streets of Seoul pretty nicely.

Almost as I reached Jungkook's apartment complex, I looked up from the ground and found him walking towards me on the street.

"Jungkook." I called, grabbing his attention and waving.

Jungkook looked up from where his feet were walking and smiled as our eyes met, waving back.

"Hi." I said as we stopped in front of each other.

"Hi." Jungkook replied.

It was two days since we last saw each other. It felt quite awkward, yet not so awkward standing in front of him like this. Last time we saw each other, we kissed.

"What are you doing here?" Jungkook questioned and caressed the top of my head. It made my heart pound like crazy.

I looked him up and down before answering, "I was on my way to see you, are you going anywhere?" I asked, already feeling a bit disappointed. Maybe he was.

"Just the grocery store." He said, making me at ease and I almost let out a sigh of relief.

"Good." I smiled, "Do you want to hang today?" I questioned, shifting in my spot.

Why was I nervous to ask him to hang when I'd asked him hundreds of times before? Why was I getting shy, thinking about walking down the path surrounded by cherry trees with him, alone?

Jungkook didn't get to answer before I continued telling him about my plans, "I really want to go see the cherry trees blossom and then afterwards we could-"

"See the cherry trees?" Jungkook interrupted me, furrowing his brows.

"Yeah." I smiled but a hesitant feeling rushed over me.

Doesn't he want to?

"Since when do you want to see those?" He laughed, looking at me as if I was totally alien to him.

My smile faded slightly at his mocking tone, but really I couldn't blame him. I had never been interested in flowers and he knew that. He bought me flowers once, to which I of course thanked him, but told him I'd rather have chocolate in the future... or something that at least not would die. Flowers wither, some only after a few days, and somehow I never liked that.

Ironically enough, I was like those flowers myself.

I was about to answer, when he got ahead of me, "Why do you suddenly have so many things you want to do?" He said with something that almost sounded like a scoff.

He was probably just curious, but it sounded like an accusation.

He said it with a tone as if he found me ridiculous.

"Jungkook come on." I said, forcing a chuckle to seem as if he didn't just hurt me a bit. Maybe it was on accident it came out like that?

"The cherry trees only blossom once a year, and I've heard it's the prettiest pink-"