First Time

78

Emily

Two weeks of suspension from school sounds like the worst thing in the world. However, they turn out to be the best two weeks of my life so far.

Living with Aiden is not without problems, but the bliss far outweighs anything else. During the day, he goes to work whilst I stay home and make dinner. In the evenings we watch movies and make love. On weekends, we go out on walks and picnics as the cold winter turns into a mild spring. We're in our own little bubble and I don't ever want it to end.

But it does.

I am miserable on Monday morning as I get dressed for school. I stand facing the mirror fumbling with the buttons of my blouse.

"Hey, you ok?" Aiden asks thoughtfully as he finishes dressing himself.

He comes to stand behind me and wraps his arms around my waist.

"What's wrong? You ok?"

"Yeah," I sigh.

"Hmm...I don't think so."

"I just don't want to go back to school."

"I know. I wish you didn't have to go but it will be alright. Be strong."

He kisses me on the cheek.

"It's going to be so weird being there without you."

"It won't be for long. It will be summer before we know it. Also, I've worked out my shifts so I am done by the time school is done so we can walk home together every day."

"Really," I turn to him with a beaming smile.

"Yep, so I will be waiting outside the gates for you."

I stand on my tiptoes, and he meets me halfway for a kiss.

"Come on, you don't want to be late," he tells me, letting me go.

As I finish throwing on my uniform and he grabs his jacket, my phone starts to buzz. I glance at the name on the screen and throw it back in my bag.

"Who is it?" he asks while we make our way downstairs.

"It's mum again."

Mum has called and texted me non-stop for the last two weeks, but I have ignored her each time. I have nothing to say to either of my parents anymore.

As Aiden holds the front door open for me to leave first, he looks at me with a worried look.

"You know, if you ever change your mind and want to go home..."

"I am home," I smile at him.

He smiles too and kisses me again before we leave.

I purposefully arrive to school late, so I don't have to walk through a crowd of kids gossiping about me. Not that it makes much of a difference because they just gossip about me in class. The whispers and giggles and dirty looks give me an uneasy, tight feeling in my chest. I just want the earth to open up and swallow me whole. I try to ignore them and keep my head down throughout each lesson.

When it comes to lunch time, I release the breath I didn't know I was holding with a big sigh. The day is going so slow, and it feels like I've been here forever. I feel like walking out of the doors but an image on Aiden standing outside the gates at home time keeps me going. I have to be strong; I can't give up.

As I walk into the lunch hall, the looks and whispers increase. This is truly awful and is making me paranoid.

What are they saying about me?

I wish I could go back to the peaceful time when no one knew me or would look at me walking into the room. If this is what it feels like to be popular, I don't want it. Heart pounding and on the verge of running out of the doors, I scan the crowd desperately for a familiar face. I notice Nicole and Imogen in a corner of the room having a heated discussion with Tim and Gwen.