SHIFU: I've been taking it easy on you, panda, but no more! Your next opponent... will be me.
PO: Alright! Yeah, let's go!
The Five exchange worried looks. Po and Shifu face off.
SHIFU: Step forth.
Po doesn't even finish the step as Shifu whirls him around with no effort and and throws him to the floor pinning his arm behind him.
SHIFU: The true path to victory is to find your opponent's weakness and make him suffer for it.
PO: [In pain, but delighted.] Oh ho, yeah!
Shifu throws Po around again.
SHIFU: To take his strength and use it against him. [Shifu kicks Po repeatedly in the face. He throw him to the floor again, and grips Po by the nose.] Until he finally falls, or quits.
Po is totally inspired.
PO: [Nasally] But a real warrior never quits. Don't worry, Master, I will never quit!
At his breaking point, Shifu flings Po into the air and then leaps at him with a flying kick. Po crashes out of the door and tumbles down the steps. The Five walk outside and watch him fall.
TIGRESS: If he's smart, he won't come back up those steps.
MONKEY: But he will.
Tigress walks back inside.
VIPER: He's not gonna quit, is he?
MANTIS: He's not gonna quit bouncin', I'll tell ya that.
He begins laughing, but Viper silences him with a stern hiss. Po yells in the distance as he continues to tumble...
In his bunkhouse room that evening, Po is still yelling in pain.
PO: Aaaoo...whoohoo...EEEee...hee- hee... OW! I thought you said acupuncture would make me feel [Mantis pops us from behind Po holding a handful of needles and sticks him again.] better!
MANTIS: Trust me, it will. It's just not easy finding the right nerve points under all this...
PO: Fat?
MANTIS: Fur, I was going to say fur.
Removes the needle and moves to another part of Po's back.
PO: [Skeptical] Sure you were.
MANTIS: [Adjusts a needle and taps Po's back for nerves.] Who am I to judge a warrior based on his size? I mean... look at me.
Po looks for Mantis...
MANTIS: I'm over here.
...But Mantis is now on his other shoulder. He jabs another needle into Po.
PO: Ah-HAH!
VIPER: Maybe you should take a look at this again.
Viper, who is also in the room, is holding a diagram of acupuncture meridians (onto which someone has overlaid a drawing of a panda.)
MANTIS: [looks at the diagram] Oh! Okay.
Meanwhile, Monkey is meditating in another room.
PO: Ow! Don't... [laughing]
Monkey opens his eyes. Annoyed at the disturbance, Monkey sticks his fingers in his ears. In another room, Crane is doing calligraphy.
PO: Stop it, stop... YOW!
Startled, Crane accidentally smears the paper. Back in his own room, Po settles down. We see moxxie and Millie are in the room too with a few needles on their bodies as well and they were okay now
YOU ARE READING
Helluva boss: alternate continuation
FanfictionAfter their disastrous anniversary at Ozzie's, moxxie and Millie leave imp city convinced that it was all blitzo's fault quitting the company all together. But little did they know was that they would be taken to a place that would take them to diff...
To learn kung fu
Start from the beginning
