Unintentionally Falling

chapter forty

Iris

I need to see Aaron.

I need to see him now. Quickly I change out of my comfy clothes for something much cuter. I don't even process what I'm doing. I wash my face, brush my teeth, comb through my hair and tie it up. I slap on concealer to try and hide the puffiness of my eyes, I add a little more makeup to my face and then I'm rushing on to put my Docs at the speed of light.

Out the apartment door, I go running, out the university complex and onto the campus streets. Hopefully, he's at his place. The air is cold and the streets are illuminated by the streetlights. I run and run, until I can't feel my legs anymore, his place isn't that far anyway. My body is buzzing from both nerves and excitement just to see him.

I wonder how he's doing, what he's doing. I'm wondering about a lot of things right now. My head races with questions, with a thousand what-ifs. All of them had tied with Aaron somehow.

Without looking where I'm going I collided with someone. This person is much bigger and taller than me 'cause I'm the one who faces the brunt of the collision. "Shit," I mumble when I fall on my ass embarrassingly.

The stranger doesn't laugh at this, which automatically means morally they're a much better person than I am. Mainly because if the roles were swapped I would've fucking bellowed at this scene.

I take a split second to register what the fuck is going on when a hand reaches out to help me up.

This hand is nice as fuck, veiny with long fingers. And those fingers are decorated with expensive silver rings. So expensive that I couldn't even dream of being able to afford them. I know those hands and my breath has stopped short.

I peer up to find a frustratingly handsome face staring back at me, his body frozen, eyes wide like he doesn't know what's going to happen next. Yet his hand is still reaching for mine. It feels like it's been an eternity since I've seen Aaron, where we've both grown older but look entirely the same.

I take it hastily pulling myself up, I watch the way his eyes fly over every single point of my body like he can't believe I'm even here right now.

There are so many things I want to say. But I settle with a simple, "Hey," I send him a grateful smile just because he's right in front of me.

His eyes soften and it's illuminated by the streetlight we're standing under. He swallowed, then shakily responded. "Hi."

Silence overtakes us as each of us grapples with what the fuck we should say next. Speak, Iris. I've got to say something to him. Just tell him, that's all you got to do.

" Uh...I wanna talk to you about something."

"I would like to talk to you."

We both utter at the same time. Then a silent pause at just how awkward that was. Aaron grimaces while I let out a small laugh.

"You go first," I tell him. I can wait, I can be patient for once in my life.

"Are you sure?" His eyes flicker from one eye to another, a seriousness taking over his voice.

I nod, and he lets out a deep breath. He looks down at the ground and then I watch him almost have to force himself to look at me.

"Look, I'm so sorry. If you don't want to be friends with me anymore, even though it hurts  I understand that. I truly hope that I never felt like I pressured you from being friends into something more. I do... I do like you a lot Iris. And I never want you to feel like I'm expecting all these things. I love being friends with you... I love just being with you. I like you so much it drives me crazy, even if you want to just be friends it's enough to satisfy me. If you don't want to be friends though—the thought makes me miserable but a friendship goes two ways after all."