I, the Original

Epilogue

Of course, things couldn't end up as simple as that and Esther rose from the grave due to the meddling of the Spirits. As perfectly expected, she tried her little 'link the kids and kill them' ritual, but I managed to get one up on her and killed her. I secured her blood, of course, after all, aunty Dahlia still needed to die. I used Freya in order to convince Finn to join us and explained the whole firstborn curse thing to my favorite psychopaths.

Alaric Saltzman's rising darkness wasn't my problem, but I stole the Gilbert Ring just in case.

We left Mystic Falls because the town was a magnet for danger. Fortunately, they agreed to move to Los Angeles, instead of New Orleans, since I wanted to avoid the New Orleans drama. Of course, the supernatural community of LA was not thrilled to host the Mikaelson clan, but we promised to behave. A promise, which Niklaus promptly broke in the most ridiculous manner, when he began dating the daughter of the local werewolf alpha. Figures. Oh, btw, her name was also Andrea. Andrea Beaumont.

And thus, Hope was born. Of course, with Hope's birth the problems began, and Freya woke up. A tense reunion later, followed by Klaus' incessant prodding, we all got on board my personal Dahlia murder plan. Dahlia was a powerful witch, of that there was no doubt. She was a one-woman-army of magical power. In my opinion, only the Hollow was stronger. Unfortunately for her, she had one glaring weakness - arrogance. Oh, so much arrogance.

After a failed and staged attempt to kill her with a knife made out of her weaknesses, we managed to lure her to a location, where we said we would give her the baby. We lied, of course. The ventilation system flooded the room with Esther's blood, Mikael's ashes and Norwegian soil, all turned to dust so that they could spread through the air and neutralize her magic. And then, with a second knife, we killed her.

Life was pretty non canonical afterwards. With the Strix under my control and without the Trinity, the whole Beast drama was avoided. Of course, in trying to avoid New Orleans some things turned out for the worse. At least for New Orleans. Davina died without being consecrated and this unleashed all her magic as a wild storm, which should aptly be named the Hurricane Davina. Not that it was. A freak accident, they called it. Yeah, right.

Among other surprises was how Elijah went off on his own and met none other than one Hayley Marshal. How the fuck did that ship set sail, I still can't figure out. What's more, apparently my brother had stumbled upon her at near Whitmore College, where the Augustines had tried to take him for experiments. It didn't end well for them. It was bad, apparently. Blood and gore bad. But, hey, he released and befriended Enzo, a guy who I had totally forgotten about. A black point for me on that one, but being a thousand years old, you are allowed to forget a few things. Hell, there are probably a ton of things I had forgotten about.

When the whole Travelers drama came to Mystic Falls, I had slapped myself on my head for forgetting about them. Still, shockingly enough, an army of elite elder vampires, backed by a coven of prodigy witches, could take that group of vagabond body-jumping witches any day.

By the way, that is when Klaus met Caroline again and the two had a one-night-stand, followed by a messy break up with Tyler and, guess what...

Klaus and Caroline are now a thing.

Go figure.

Not long after, a certain Josette Laughlin met a certain Alaric Saltzman (who had at some point apparently broken up with Jenna Sommers) and that little bit of romance resulted in our favorite Saltzman twins being born. Surprisingly enough, that proverbial butterfly was awfully picky. At least, this time there were no uninvited guests to their wedding.

Still, to throw a wrench in the butterfly's wings, I decided to open a Mikaelson Academy for the Young and Gifted in LA. I figured that it would be a relaxing job to teach young supernaturals on how to handle their powers. And with Hope being born, we all got inspired to be better and keep the villainy to an appropriate minimum.

And since my life is apparently written about by some fanfiction writer, on Caroline's advice, Josie (because the Saltzman family apparently lacked imagination) and Lizzie had come to study at said academy, when they were 16.

It took Hope the grand total of 12 days to realize she may like Josie.

25 more days to realize she definitely liked Josie.

And two more weeks of shy looks of longing before I ran out of patience and dragged the pair of them to my office. There I, as a most benevolent Cupid, revealed that they liked each other to each of them.

Then I left them alone to talk it out like a responsible adult.

And found them ten minutes later making out on my desk.

This is what I get for being so generous.

As for me and Katherine...

Well, turns out a life without scheming and hatred can be pretty liberating. We got our happily ever after. I leave the details to you.

I recommend this bliss to everyone.

THE END!