Marry me with flowers

CHAPTER | 2

MEGAN

It was crazy. My mind was running faster than light. One second, I was waiting to catch the flower bouquet and the next I saw Miles on his knees with a ring in his palm.

It was a dream. It definitely had to be a dream. This wasn't real at all. Why would he want to marry me out of all people?

When I looked around, I could see millions of eyes looking back at me with stark wonder and disorderly astonishment. How could a guy like Miles propose a girl like me?

Miles and I had never talked about this at all. We had talked about my health, his business, my business and his need to expand his passionate cooking. But never had we talked about marriage. It was foreign territory and it frightened me. My legs started to shake and I couldn't stand still. I felt helpless and choked. My head had started to spin and my hands shivered as a tear leaked out.

I had never been an overachiever. I never dreamed of things that were out of my reach. I stayed within my limits knowing what were reachable for a simple woman like me. I always concentrated on what I needed rather than what I wanted.

But when Miles got into my life – it was a precious change to my normal routine. I had started doing things I never imagined myself doing. Soon, I had stretched myself up to reach for things that were beyond me. Like aiming for the star when I couldn't get hold of the sky. Like everything that is good, I knew this would come to an end too.

I loved Miles, more than I would let on... on most days at least. Perhaps, that was the reason why I took his side and stood up for him all those years ago. When it had become too much – the idea of him hurting me just for the kicks – I had called quits and fled. I had decided to listen to my mind rather than my heart. I thought it was for the best. Best interest of mine. But how wrong was I?

Now, even when we were together, I couldn't but have a thin sheath of insecurity when it came to him. The what-if's always made me hinder myself from doing anything startlingly courageous.

I had fled as the images of Miles with hopeful eyes looked back at me. I had let my emotions get to me and I had let Miles down. Yet again. I didn't realize when I had run away from him once more or when Amber had come in and had started to give me her piece of mind. Nor did I realize Miles coming in to send Amber out.

"Megan, I don't mind if you don't want to marry. But I do want to know only one thing. Do you not want to marry me or is marriage something that scares you?" Miles asked bringing me back from my troubled reverie.

He doesn't mind if I don't want to marry? Then, why had he made a fool of himself? Why did he have to put me in the spotlight? I gasped as I let his words sink deep in me.

"Oh, darling." Miles sighed. "Come here."

He pulled my hands towards him. Not able to register what was happening around, I sat there mutely like a puppet as tears ran down my cheeks. He made me sit on his lap as he wiped my tears away.

"We always talk what we are feeling, right?" He asked and I couldn't help but nod my head towards him. "Tell me what's wrong. I promise I won't be mad."

At that my tears sprang more than before. We were supposed to be in a relationship. But look at us! Often, I was the child that Miles had to mollycoddle, wipe my eyes to see the right of things. This wasn't a relationship. It was babysitting.

"We can't." I murmured.

I felt Miles stiffen for a second. "What do you mean we can't, Megan? I'm not following."

Ever since I opened up about my panic attacks to Miles, he had been the parent I never had. He took me to therapy, fed me the right medicines, looked after my mood swings and even at times participated in my business. He always made sure that I talked before I took things in my head and cooked them together.