North of Heaven (A Jared Leto Fanfiction)

TEN

Jared had never cared for goodbyes. He never thought of them to be as important as they potentially are, he never got emotional or felt a slight lump in his throat when he said fair well to whoever. He'd never really experienced a tough goodbye, not even when he left his mother when he was younger to study in New York. But stood in front of Emily's little frame, bundled up in a thick and woolly jumper, he found it almost physically impossible to get on the plane. Looking down into her eyes had his feet rigid to the floor. Jared clasped to every second he was in Emily's vicinity as he knew it was inevitable that he had to go soon.

"I'll call you when I land." Jared was close enough to Emily that he encapsulated her senses, his hands grasped her waist and his head hung low so much so that his mouth was inches from her ear. She would miss him whilst he was away, she knew that much. But she was also quite pleased with the space she'd gain. She didn't know what was going on between herself and Jared. If somebody asked what their relationship was, she would be lost for words. She needed the space, the time, to analyze a little. Decipher potential give aways and patterns to give her some heads up on what was going to become of the two of them. Up until then, sending Jared off at the airport, she hadn't really thought too deeply about what was occurring between them. She succumb to the motions and just went with whatever happened, but now she'd reached the biting point. She needed a clear idea in her head, an obvious outcome. Jared was becoming a significant fixture in her life as the days went by, and as they did, so did the need to establish their relationship.

Emily smiled graciously up at his clean shaven face and she saw the subtle flicker of his forehead, his eyes squinted and he peered into her deep brown aura's questioningly.

"Are you all right?" Jared reached forward, grasping onto the woman in front of him by the elbows. "You look like you've got a lot on your mind." She felt his thumbs gently caress the fabric of her jumper and she had to glance down at her feet to hid the fact he knew her too well, could tell something was wrong without her mentioning a word. Still, she lied through her teeth.

"I'm fine, I promise." Jared knew something was bothering her, he could see it in the way she shuffled around and the way her eyes were darting all over his features. He licked his lips and took a small step towards her, his chest inches from hers now, his thumbs never ceasing their stroke. He wanted to know what was going on in her head, he wanted her to open up to him, to let him in. But he couldn't just force the walls down. He had to wait for her to knock them down herself.

"Are you sure sweetie?" Jared's voice was sweet and caring and it made Emily's heart rate flutter, which was a feeling she was trying to avoid until she'd figured out what exactly Jared meant to her. She chuckled softly at his attempts and pressed her palms flat against his chest.

"Yes! I'm fine Jared. Absolutely and completely fine." Jared's eyes never let up from her face, his eyes still bled with concern. If Emily wasn't careful and he continued to hunt for the hidden troubles in her mind, he'd discover her unsettlement immediately. "Now go and get on your plane before you miss it." She nudged him slightly, trying to get Jared to step back and give her some space. The sooner he was sat on that plane and airborne the quicker she could begin to analyze.

"Okay." Jared glanced down at his feet and took a step backwards away from Emily. He was about to swivel around and walk away, head of to the gate that was being called for boarding, but he couldn't physically allow himself to just walk away from her like that. Jared remained in front of Emily as he reached forward, delicately placing his palm against the side of her cheek. She smiled under his touch and he felt the internal dread pull his soul down at the idea of having to leave her behind.

"I'm going to miss you." Jared's voice was sincere and warming and Emily knew he wasn't just saying that. She knew his words were true. And she knew she felt the same. She smiled at him, pulling her bottom lip in between her teeth and her eyes glittered in awe that she had such an incredible human being in her vicinity. She asked herself how she managed to get so lucky to know him, let alone be in an estranged relationship with him.