Dear Diary

36. SECRETS, LIES, AND MURDER

S A M A R A

Detective Tuan clears me to leave the station with my mom after he's done interviewing me. Mom only speaks when we're inside her car.

"Samara—"

"I'm sorry for not going straight home," I say.

"I wasn't going to mention that," she says. "Are you okay?"

I shrug. Am I okay? The notion that Brandan killed Sidney doesn't feel real. I defended him against public opinion. I defended him against my friends. But when I held that jacket in my hands, I couldn't deny what was right in front of me. That'll never be okay.

The police say they received an anonymous tip about the jacket and that's why they came to Brandan's house in the first place with a search warrant. I just so happened to be there. Derek had to come in and confirm the jacket was his, which he did. Now they have to run tests on it for DNA evidence that would place it at the murder scene. Brandan denies any involvement, but it doesn't look good.

Mom puts a comforting hand on my shoulder. "At least you know now, baby girl. If they confirm Sidney's blood on the jacket, you may finally be able to put this behind you."

"Can I be with my friends tonight?" I ask. "I can't handle this alone. I need them." Asking her is a courtesy. I'm doing it regardless of her answer. Not like she'd know anyway since she's still busy. Though, I have to give her credit for being more attentive to me. Things aren't perfect, but they're coming along.

She sighs but nods her head. "I think you've fulfilled your punishment. Be with your friends. For the first time in a long time, I feel confident that you'll be safe now that the police are focused on Brandan. Hopefully this talk about a curfew can be dropped and we all can feel safe again."

"I hope you're right."

She starts the car and pulls out of the lot, and I stare out the window as we leave the station behind.

***

"Are we supposed to ignore the possibility that D.T. planted that jacket?" Rome says, sitting down next to me on his couch. "I mean, an 'anonymous source'? Come on."

"If that's the case it had to have been done recently," Kelly adds on the other side of me. "Brandan would've noticed it otherwise."

Rome appears lost in his head. "Bran was with us on the receiving end of several incidents, and he couldn't have been the one to cause them. The house fire, my mom—"

"What if he had a partner?" Gio asks.

"Maybe he does. Or, maybe he's innocent."

I was so caught up in getting away at the time, I didn't take a proper moment to consider the jacket being a plant, and if that was the case, I might've sealed Brandan's fate. I hold my head in my hands. "So who else do we have?"

"There's a long list of people who wouldn't mind seeing Sidney dead, and we've been through the wringer with quite a few of them, to the point where it's hard to imagine any of them being D.T.," Rome says.

Gio grunts. "So what you're saying is we have jackshit."

"Secrets, lies, and murder," Kelly mumbles. "When will it end?"

"Let's try an exercise," Derek says from a stool he's sitting on near the kitchen. It's his first time saying more than two words tonight. Initially, he wasn't part of the plans to be here, since he's still upset with us, but since what happened with Brandan he agreed to show up. "How about we all come clean about whatever shitty thing we've done in the past, yeah? Seeing as how it's coming to bite us all in the ass anyway, better that we all tell each other everything right here. With any luck, it'll help us figure this out." The room goes silent. Derek raises an eyebrow. "No one?"

"I hooked up with Raya behind Tori's back," Rome says. "I feel horrible about it. So, there."

There's a brief moment of stunned silence before Gio speaks. "Okay . . . that's interesting."

"Since we're being honest about everything," I start, "Brandan kissed me and I didn't necessarily hate it. It's been weighing on me for obvious reasons." I look around the room, gauging reactions. Derek's the only one who appears surprised, considering he's the only one that had no clue previous to this. "It was confusing for a while, but I told him that it can't happen. So, that's my thing."

Derek narrows his eyes at me, then shakes his head. "Okay. Anyone else?" His eyes land on Kelly. She frowns at him and I sense a weird energy between them.

Kelly and Derek . . .

"Kelly?" I turn to face her. "I've been meaning to ask you about something, but I haven't known how to go about it. I wanted to make sure there was validity to what I was looking into before coming to you."

She looks confused. "What do you want to ask me?"

"Idris Patel. I'm asking you about Idris Patel."

Her eyes go wide, darting between Derek and I. He looks a little shocked that I've brought it up, too. Whatever the truth is, it's safe to bet that both of them were involved in what happened to Idris.

Tears fill Kelly's eyes as I speak. "D.T. called me and implied you knew something about that case. Kelly, did you—"

"It was an accident! No one was supposed to get hurt," she blurts. Again she looks at Derek and their eyes are locked in an intense gaze. "I'm sorry."

"You were renting the car suspected of killing Idris," Gio says to Derek. "I wouldn't have known it then, but I looked back at that picture you sent me while you and Sid were out of town. The car is a match."

"I wanted to tell the truth from the get-go. I was begged not to," Derek says.

Tears make slick paths down Kelly's face. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Kelly, you said it was an accident," I say, putting my hand over hers. "Did you or Derek accidentally hit Idris?"

She shakes her head. "No. It was Sidney . . . Sidney killed him."