12/26/22
Files on the examination of Jane Ivers,
written by Mattheo Vitiello
Journal Entry One
She perplexes me.
I was promised a machine-like thing, something conditioned to follow orders. I was promised a healer, one with no feelings, one who would listen to orders. It's safe to say that wasn't what I got.
I was promised a contraption, but was given a girl. I've been warned of her insanity, but I didn't quite believe it until I saw it with my own eyes. But it wasn't repulsive, or annoying—no, it was remarkable.
Everything was so unexpected. Her thoughts, her terror, the way she looked at me. Another thing that was unexpected was how much I liked it. I have only just been exposed to the mind of Jane Ivers, and I wanted more. As a boy who didn't care enough, it was refreshing to see someone care so much.
Delusional, dangerous—all words my father used when describing her to me. I had expected someone to be terrified of, not someone who was terrified themselves. She was none of the things they were making her out to be, at least not fully. Not really. Not fully.
This was going to be harder than I expected. They've misrepresented her on such an end, to such a big extent that I couldn't tell if this were a joke or not. For days, I've read about this patient they had to make sure was completely sedated, strapped, drugged, and gagged in order to touch. I don't think that they realize that even without the restraints, even without the drugs clogging her present–that I'm sure she wouldn't have fought them, anyway.
I was promised the mind of one of the biggest dangers to society. This was not the mind I was promised. But it was a mind that interested me, anyway.
When I had pulled out the blade, she hadn't moved, hadn't flinched–not because she didn't think I'd hurt her, but because she didn't care. The most interesting thing, though? When I had turned the blade back on myself, then—only then—had she been scared.
It's just that, this vicious thing wasn't vicious at all. She was, in every sense of the word, harmless. And I don't know how I feel about it.
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hey luvrs, sorry for the short confusing chapters and for all the plot<3 hope you liked them though, don't forget to vote + comment ! Also thank you for 10k 🫶🏻
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