forward / slash ✭ matt sturniolo

FORTY-NINE

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IRL
paragraphs of italics = Matt's letter
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There's a lot I want to say, so first I'll say happy birthday. Kissing you in your kitchen wasn't a mistake. I shouldn't have made you feel like it was. It's one of my second biggest regrets. My first is breaking up with you. I broke up with you out of fear and I was so stupid to let that stand in the way. I want you to know that if I can get a second chance with you, I will not fuck it up. You're beautiful, funny, and the most caring person I know. I miss you, Leanna. Even thinking of never speaking to you again makes me want to throw up. You are one of the most important people in my life and I love you. That's why I kissed you that night. I never stopped loving you, I want you to know that. I really do hope you kill it in New York like I know you will. I can't wait to hear your music.

Love, Matt

Leanna carefully sets down the piece of paper on her vanity. Looking at herself in her mirror, she glances back down at the letter. Quickly applying her lipgloss, she grabs the sheet of paper and tape from her drawer. As Leanna tapes Matt's letter around the edge of her full-length mirror (alongside her Boston University acceptance email and photos of her with friends), she feels a buzz in her pocket. Leanna doesn't have to pull her phone out to know that Matt's texting her that he's at her front door. She fixes her hair before hopping down the stairs to see him.

"Happy birthday!" Matt exclaims, opening his arm for Leanna. She happily enters them and she feels him kiss the top of her head. She pulls away, without breaking the hug, to take a better look at him. Matt's looking down at her, smiling brightly. Leanna feels her heart beat faster as he leans down to kiss her.

"Thank you," She says against his lips, grinning as she pulls away. Leanna hears her mom begin her rendition of 'Happy Birthday' with her father coming in with his— horrible— harmonies from the kitchen.

Leanna cranes her neck in the direction of her parents' voices. Matt laughs at the mixture of her dad's tenor and mom's soprano.

"They won't stop till I blow out my candles."

With that, she takes his hand and pulls him into the kitchen. Upon entering, Leanna sees her mom lighting her 19 candles. Penelope carries her daughter's cake over to Leanna who is sitting down by the kitchen island. From behind the camcorder, her dad zooms in on Matt who hugs Leanna from behind before standing beside Arlo. Looking around the kitchen, her heart fills with love. Closing her eyes, she comes up with her wish.

I wish to always have an amazing support system around me.

Blowing out her candles she is almost immediately met with her mother embracing her and blubbering about how her baby is growing up. And while Leanna loves her mom, she's scared of dying from asphyxiation with how tightly she's holding her. Arlo eventually detaches Penelope from Leanna, shooing Matt and Leanna out of the house, telling them: 'She's going to be like this for the next 30 minutes.'

Walking out of the house, a chill breeze sweeps over Leanna, causing her to shiver slightly. Noticing this, Matt shrugs off his black and white jacket, putting it on Leanna's shoulders.