13| Let loose

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It's almost a relief to end up back at Blake's, as though we're better suited in the drags of his basement than we are in my bedroom. I help to set up, lining the counters with alcohol and snacks before preparing the beer pong table. Blake sorts out the music, then turns down the lights until the basement looks more like a cave.

"Think that about covers it," he says, moving to the counter. "You want a drink?" He picks up a beer, about to hand it over, but I fervently shake my head. I plan to remain sober for the hour I'm here and then drive myself home. "Suit yourself," he says, popping the top, and he takes a sip.

When I can't take the silence any longer, I walk over and reach for the chip bowl instead, eating my nerves away. Blake stands beside me, wearing that look like he can't decide whether to be annoyed by my presence or if he finds my antics amusing.

"Remember," he says, pulling the chip bowl away from me, "no mention of mafia books."

"No mafia books – got it." I reach into my back pocket, pulling out a business card I'd stuffed there before we left. "Do you think I should give these out when they get here?" I flip the card around to show him the Vote For Rose Matthews business cards I made last year.

He stares at the card as though I've just pulled a rabbit from a hat. "How many of those did you bring?"

"Around thirty," I say. "I couldn't fit anymore in my pocket."

He steps closer. My heart pounds as he shoves his hand into my back pocket and pulls out the rest of the cards. With a cutting look, he tosses them in the trash behind me.

"Keep your hands," I say, my voice surprisingly even, "to yourself."

"With pleasure," he says and downs the rest of his beer.

It's not long before Blake's friends arrive. I spot a few familiar faces first, like Kenny and Freddie, but the river of flowing bodies soon become unrecognizable. I grow nervous, unsure of where to stand as they fill up the basement. The music is blaring, and the room is suddenly hazy with weed, making my eyes burn. I turn around, searching for Blake through the crowd of people, but I can't see him anywhere. I'm officially on my own.

Panic rises up my throat as I stand against the furthest wall. That's when I spot Blake on the sofa, surrounded by smoke and joking with his friends. My heart suddenly does this giant leap in my chest like I've just jumped off a cliff. I'm no longer on the same planet as my comfort zone, but seeing Blake gives me a semblance of clarity. If I can just get through the next hour or so, it could improve my chances of getting these people to vote for me. I just have to do what Blake keeps telling me: relax.

The longer I watch him, the more I realize that it's nice to see this side of him. He looks easy and relaxed, the way I'd imagine he'd be with me if he actually liked me. For a brief, insane second, I wish that he did.

"What's she doing here?" A girl nearby whispers.

"No idea," her friend says back. "I heard Blake's her campaign captain, though. You think he's fucking her?"

"As if. Did you hear what she did in spring break, though?"

My cheeks burn as I step back into the shadows. I'm on the verge of dipping out the back door when someone taps my shoulder, forcing me to turn around. Liv and some guy from my physics class stand before with beers in their hands.

"Didn't think I'd see you here," Liv says, smiling. She looks different tonight: she's wearing a tight gray The White Stripes tee with faded ripped jeans and sneakers. Her hair is scraped up into a killer high pony, and while she doesn't usually wear makeup, her lips are vampire red.

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